Ouch

Today, I learned how it feels to sneeze after having major spinal surgery when the pain medication has almost completely worn off. FML

Today, I found out how it feels when someone slips and falls while they have a hypodermic needle in your arm. FML

Today, I gave blood. He sneezed while he stuck the needle in my arm. FML

Today, my needle-phobic mother took me to get a shot. She fainted. FML

Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML

Today, I went to get some teeth pulled. I had Novocaine in my gums and lip so I couldn't feel a thing. When the doctor is pulling out the last tooth, he sneezes and pulls the tooth out. He looks in my mouth and I hear, "Oh, shit..." I now have stitches in my mouth. FML

Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML

Side effects

Today, I sneezed so hard, I farted. During my vaccine appointment. I hate hayfever. FML

Today, I decided to give blood for the second time. I felt excrutiating pain when she stuck the needle in my arm. Another nurse came running over in a panic. Apparently my inexperienced nurse had put it in my tendon instead of my vein. FML

Today, while at work, a sneeze snuck up on me. Ever sneeze so violently your fake tooth shoots into the cubicle across from you? FML