Today, I went to a hockey game. While warm-ups were happening, my favourite player pointed at me and tossed me a puck. It bounced off my hand into another girl's, who was a fan of the other team. She refused to give it back, then walked away and said, "I can't wait to sell this on eBay." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML
Today, I went to see a hockey game. The announcer asked if anybody found a ring in the stands, because a girl lost hers. While he talked about it, I realised that I forgot mine in my pocket, so I took MY ring and put it on my finger. A guy saw me and thought I stole the lost one. FML
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML
Today, while playing hockey, one of my teammates decided to swing her hockey stick like a golf club. She missed the ball, but managed to hit me right in the vagina. FML
Today, I took my father to a hockey game. He always has to get pictures with the girls, so while in bag check, he used his breath spray. He got me in the eye, and I was temporarily blinded through most of the first period. FML
Today, I had just bought a new $60 basketball and decided to go try it out. Five minutes into playing, the ball decided to roll into the hands of a little girl, who then said, "Mine!" I thought it was cute, until she skipped over to her parent's car, and they drove off. FML
Today, I was at the Kings Avalanche game in Denver. Anže Kopitar scored a hat trick and people threw hats in. Someone ripped my own hat off my head and tossed it on the ice. It was a gift from my dead grandparents with my name stitched onto it. I’ve had it for 15 years. FML
Today, I had a soccer game. A player from the other team hit me in the face. In the next half, she was the goalie and I was determined to score on her. When I finally got my chance to, everyone cheered, until I kicked the ball into the goal post and it bounced back and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML
Today, at a soccer game held by my girlfriend's family, some idiot went to kick the ball, missed by a mile, and hit the ground hard. So I started a slow, sarcastic clap. I got a load of angry looks, followed by verbal abuse when we found out he'd split his head open on the ground. FML
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Top comments
Zoldyck 17
I can't stand greedy people like that. I hope a frisbee flies into her face the next day.
fariss 14
Tell her this " give it back or ill puck you up real bad, motherpucker"
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Comments (70)
NopaDo 17
Holy shit man, sorry :C people can be real asses sometimes.
Zoldyck 17
I can't stand greedy people like that. I hope a frisbee flies into her face the next day.
Lalala579121 28
That'd be almost like what happened to the fan who heckled a player for getting a cut on his nose. Later that same game a puck went into the stands and hit him in the face.
fuckedPriceless 17
all it takes is one punch and the puck would have been mine again
tac0609 13
I'm sure something like that will happen. Karma's a bitch
gmax 10
I hope it's a car
PurpleMyth 28
#2 I think you mean a truck
jerzjay 17
Should have laid off of the popcorn op
delainmaggie 11
#3, how is this even relevant?
JayRod17 12
@14 it's relevant like butter fingers, made it slip, get it?
Jared900DUmpling 30
Either way that was a really stupid joke. Especially since it had to be explained
phreaker913 21
i got it #3. good joke. haters gonna hate
queencabello 19
Just because you didn't get the joke doesn't mean it's stupid. It's common sense.
ProximityToDeath 20
That sounds like me, I couldn't catch to save my life.
meg13rocks 26
People are so greedy at popular sport events. One time my mom got hit in the head by a foul ball, and the man who caught it refused to give it to her.
fariss 14
Tell her this " give it back or ill puck you up real bad, motherpucker"
McDerp 11
Lol, I love puns, but seriously op that really sucks. I hope she gets all flats half an hour out of town.
604 11
Win the auction! Then you'll get her address for sending payment and you can plot your sweet revenge.
llamingo 8
I like the way you think
Loyalteez 23
Shitsenders.com
NopaDo 17
Now what I want to know is how the puck bounced out of OP's hands, hey are usually pretty heavy so I can't imagine they'd flop so easily.
604 11
Do you even science? It's basic physics foo'! Baseballs are also rather solid, they still manage to bounce off gloves. Heck even bullets ricochet. Dafuq's wrong with you?
SPN_lover666 27
A hockey puck can bounce off of a persons hand quite easily. I take it you have never watched baseball? The baseball is quite heavy, but can bounce off a players glove.
NopaDo 17
My bad, had just woken up at 1 AM and posted this without thinking, this is why I should wake up before commenting I suppose.
BananaCoconutty 26
What team?
nezumii_fml 12
Wildcats!
taywuhsaurusrex 19
Since it's Toronto, my guess would be Leafs, or the Marlies. Preseason hasn't started yet though I think, so my guess is this is an old thing recently posted and the other team could have been anyone.
jayennachristine 23
In Canada, you are the puck