Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was spoken to by my boss about an argument I had gotten into with my co-worker, saying I needed to be "respectful of others' beliefs" and less "close-minded." The argument was over whether or not the Earth was flat. FML
Today, I found out the position I thought I had earned by working hard was only to separate me from my coworkers because I "talked too much". Instead of addressing the issue like adults, I've essentially been put in time-out. FML
Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML
Today, while working at Dairy Queen, a customer asked me what was so special about our ice cream cakes, and how they're different from regular cakes. I chuckled, and told her it's because they're made from ice cream. She threw a fit, which resulted in me being written up and sent home early. FML
Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML
Today, my two managers, both over 30, were arguing over whether or not butter is a sauce. FML
Today, I tried to break up a fight between two of my coworkers. They decided to show their gratitude by smashing me in the face with a thick ceramic dish. FML
Today, my boss chewed me out for leaving a work function early. I explained it was to avoid a former co-worker I constantly fought with. The boss revealed he purposely invited that former co-worker, hoping our fight would provide entertainment. FML
Today, I found out that my coworker shared a laugh with the boss about setting the office desk on fire (which he actually did), while ten minutes later I was threatened with being fired because I made paper snowflakes and hung a few of them next to the computer. FML
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
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Top comments
Naitras 15
should have let them fight. it would have been entertaining
Jimboom 12
YDI for trying to keep the peace. Don't you know the peacekeepers are always the ones to get screwed over! Next time just let them have it out, then record it on your phone and upload it to Yootoob for our entertainment value. ;-)
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Comments (104)
vgman88 4
first
afdude87 6
hmm I'm in an orange mood tonight.
marmlr339 14
only in america!!!
brainsoverbeauty 21
This argument was completely ridiculous. Everyone knows ice cream sandwiches are better :)
hellogoodbye1996 6
orange creamsicle for me
nowIshallrise 0
This is ridiculous. Go ice-cream sandwiches!
BloodyHeel 8
Good grief, ice-cream sandwiches are simply heavenly.
therealdavid 0
Orange creamsicle!!!!! mmmmm. like an ****** in your mouth.
cstrat 0
I wish the ice cream sandwich guy had just knocked out the orange creamsicle idiot.
dakota154 0
37 shut your dirty little Aussie mouth.
bioboy725 10
Eff all of you and your ice-cream sandwiches, orange cream-cicle FTW!
littlejord007 0
agree with 75, shut your mouth
YOUNGMONEY4E 0
wow 37 u tried posting 26 fmls and not one got excepted. epic fail buddy.
Enzo158 0
Dude ice cream sandwiches are orgasmic lol
Naitras 15
should have let them fight. it would have been entertaining
redday720 0
agreed
noobgang7 5
Yep! 1. Make popcorn 2. Find a nice chair 3. Watch the children fight
babyyninjas 1
rookie mistake
tatang93 0
how does crap fml like these gets approved?
dre_bro11 12
And because the wording of the FML makes it quite funny. It all depends on who's writing it, cause someone like you probably would have ****** it up in how it was written.
Rise_Up_fml 3
But this FML is clearly bullshit, 2 people were fighting and the one person trying to break it up got in trouble??? No ****** way this really happened.
dre_bro11 12
#25, if you're going to think like that, than probably 90% of these FMLs would be classified as 'fake'. You just have to deal with the fact that the FML made it through and stop ******* complaining.
McMan 23
Why were you even arguing about this!? Obviously ice cream sandwichs are better... It would be funny to see a flame war start in the comments about this. :P
duckhunter009 0
hey mcman Ontario sucks
McMan 23
Oh joy you're back for another round, can I block him somehow or do I have to pray to the mod Gods to ban him, I'll grovel if I have to. Fine, *AHEM* PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.
duckhunter009 0
come to Alberta so we can be friends :)
tedirvine 2
I agree with duckhunter haha
ctguyfml 4
orange is way better
superswagbro 7
Ice cream sandwich. That's no contest.
IMveryHUNGRY 3
Ice cream sandwich is better! Anyone have a problem with that?!
TheRealStewie 0
go **** yourself orange is better!!! ;)
ppasd 0
HELL NO #19 ICE CREAM SANDWHICH ALL THE WAY!!
MissFukMyLuck 0
agreed. ice cream sandwiches ftw
Starfire22 5
Hells no, Orange creamsicle wins!
LifeSucksbtw 0
ice cream samwich!!!! oh wait lactose intolerant :( creamcicle ftw bitches!!!!!! oh wait... nvm D:
Troll1 0
my penis wins
banana_buddy 6
I must agree with 81, I've personally felt how win it is
Jimboom 12
YDI for trying to keep the peace. Don't you know the peacekeepers are always the ones to get screwed over! Next time just let them have it out, then record it on your phone and upload it to Yootoob for our entertainment value. ;-)
nachobiznez 0
ahh that's more like it. now I can comment. I think one of those dayum moderators screwed my account. @ topic u so deserved this. why do u care enough to get involved??
Rdozer 0
Depends on whether it was a Klondike or not!
ThexFroggyGirl 21
Oh yes, Klondikes are good :] Either way, ice cream sandwich is most definitely better :D
toooldforthis 19
this is why, when I'm at work, if irritant involve me, I stay out if it. if two idiots want to fight about ice cream, let them. you don't get in trouble, they do. and on a side note, who gets in a fistfight over what flavor tastes better?
toooldforthis 19
it doesn't **