Today, I was involved in a debate. Things got out of control, insults were hurled, and by the end friends were lost. The subject of the debate? Whether snot has enough calories in it to be nutritional. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was in a heated debate about climate change. I got so flustered that I forgot the word "volcano" and ended up calling them "exploding mountain things". End of the debate. Shame. FML
Wokescolds gonna wokescold
Today, my friend went on a lengthy rant about how people are "healthy at any size" and I need to embrace fat pride, after I said I intend to lose weight to alleviate my digestive and breathing troubles. Apparently her activist forum knows more about my health than my own doctor. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my friends, and we got the idea to do some improv comedy together for a laugh. Barely two minutes into our fake political debate, everyone had apparently forgotten it was all a joke. Raging ensued, and a vicious fight quickly followed. FML
Today, my debate partner repeatedly said "You mad, bro?" to the opposing team in our college debate class. That debate was worth a considerable portion of our grade. FML
The penny drops…
Today, I had a debate at school. I had diligently studied my position, digging up historical parallels, researching the economics, and preparing citations. I lost to a guy who just yelled, "Tax the billionaires" to every question. FML
Today, I was arguing with a friend over whether or not I'm fat. She kept telling me that I was. Angry, I sat down on the chair beside her. It broke. FML
Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML
I'm not paid enough for this shit
Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML
Cravings
Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML
Healthy lifestyle goals
Today, I made a healthy, delicious dinner. My girlfriend picked at it until it went cold, then stuck it in the fridge. Later, she devoured a giant bowl of sugary cereal, then complained all night that her stomach hurt. This happens a lot. FML
Top comments
jet223 20
So. Don't leave us hanging. Is it?
jet223 20
Well actually snot itself does not boost your immune system but rather it is the first response of the immune system. The first response is not antigen specific and just keeps out all intruding substances. The mucus traps the bacterium and then sends it out via the nose and that is why it is not smart to swallow or sniff back in your mucus.
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Comments (74)
EarlFug 19
I would advise snot as only a condiment rather than main course.
igg125 30
I don't know if this is worth loosing friends over.
Lalala579121 28
Unless your friends are all tightwads and need to be loosened.
jqmalang 17
You guys need a judge.
CaptainFluffyPaw 19
So........... is it?
ProfessorMctitie 20
what a weird thing to debate over
martin8337 36
Sometimes it is best to choose one's battles.
gobiteme2 34
Only if you cover it with chocolate
maydayyparade 27
Can we just not eat snot and stick to eating foods we know are healthy
Lalala579121 28
That's snot an option here.
GeorgiaBea 28
Why? Really, I need to know...
corky1992 33
Why were you talking about something so gross anyways?