Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend, and I cheekily told him about something I'd read that's supposed to feel really good during sex. I then heard his sister sarcastically say, "Yeah, that does feel pretty good". Apparently he'd had me on speaker the whole time. FML
Today, I got a text from my neighbor complaining about my girlfriend and me being too noisy in bed. I'm at work. FML
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
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Top comments
sportmaster525 0
why did you check your text in the middle of your "activity"?
Anderling 33
That sucks. At least your sister's honest with you. FYL.
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Comments (135)
Fail_Pig 0
YDI for living in a box.
Rydizzle 0
check her pulse?!? hahhahhaa hell no!! thats pretty ****** up that your sister told you that.
burnhamt23 0
Ydi for txting during sex
Mr_Tuff_Guy 0
Frankly, You deserve it for not being good at sex.
dude85 0
better luck next time
unholy_corrupted 0
Lol well at least your sister gave you a tip. But why are you checking your texts during sex? Shouldn't you be focused on the task at hand? =P
ScaryPants3 0
Haha as many have said YDI for checking your texts during sex, apparently it wasn't that good. && I do agree with your sister.
kellster 2
Your little sister is totally right, you're an asshole for having sex in her hearing, and you're doubly an asshole for checking your texts during sex. Congratulations, you lose trebly.
lizzyhurts 0
I just like that you had to confirm that you were having sex with a girl.
toosoonbreh 0
Try harder next time you boring, lame dyke.