Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend, and I cheekily told him about something I'd read that's supposed to feel really good during sex. I then heard his sister sarcastically say, "Yeah, that does feel pretty good". Apparently he'd had me on speaker the whole time. FML
Today, I got a text from my neighbor complaining about my girlfriend and me being too noisy in bed. I'm at work. FML
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
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Top comments
sportmaster525 0
why did you check your text in the middle of your "activity"?
Anderling 33
That sucks. At least your sister's honest with you. FYL.
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Comments (135)
cheeter 0
"trust me. I know" Ughh thats disgusting on so many levels!!!
tsundere 1
I don't know why everyone's assuming the girl was his girlfriend. He only said "A girl", not his girl. YDI if you really checked your text message during sex. Not so much YDI on the sister being home; seems like you guys have an agreement or something in terms of sex.
Sturmeh 0
If she's faking it you get a free ticket to enjoy your self, if not good job!
Rawrrr14 0
okay, as funny as this is....... I too, am a little sister. Now, I am asking all guys out there and women at that, why must you have sex when people are home? I am still scarred for life.
st0815 9
You are not "scarred for life" you are just being an annoying prude. If the noise bothers you, then go someplace else for a while. Obviously you have the right to expect the same from your brother.
tech42er 0
haha, i see what you did there.
Rawrrr14 0
It's called respect. It's the principal of the thing. And, no, I really don't enjoy hearing things like that coming from my own brother thanks. I would never do that to him either, or anyone for that matter. All I'm asking is, isn't that a little embarrassing?
staystrongholdon 0
YDI for many reasons . Your sister was home , you didn't care that your girlfriend was screaming or whatever the sound was when your little sister was in the next room , and for checking your text messege while having sex . If it was so boring that you had to check your messeges , than you shouldn't be doing it . Especially if she was faking . And just because your sister says to "trust her" on knowing what a fake ****** sounds like , doesn't mean she's had sex. Just because that would be the main reason for her knowing , doesn't mean it's the only one .
stl360 0
HAHA! sucks to be you
Julioyobaby 0
LMFAO! but, #166 is right, if you have time to check a text while still doing her, there's a problem.
aidsgiver247 0
Does this mean you ****** your sister?
EmilyMylinn 0
#171 your dumb as ****! he was doing another girl. his sister just happened to text him. read the whole thing.