Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML
Romance is dead
Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend that I loved her and that I never wanted us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I'm dating and said, "You smell good." His response, "You don't." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Social butterfly
Today, an attractive coworker complimented my cologne in the elevator, so naturally I tried to respond smoothly. Instead of saying, “Thanks, it’s new” I somehow combined two thoughts and blurted out, “Thanks, I’m sweating.” We rode the remaining twelve floors in intense silence. FML
Today, my partner and I were cuddling on the couch, watching TV when she smiled and murmured, "You smell like my dad." FML
Top comments
llSgtScopell 0
Us guys can never catch a break huh?
Crabby 0
So I take it English isn't your first language? Why would anyone use the word "stench"? to "lovingly" describe someone?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (104)
Newtons_Cradle 0
hahaha men. even when they try, they end up failing. well, at least you tried. im sure she'll find it adorable in a day or so.
Jordie210 0
what would have made you say that!
24788 7
Lol, that is not right.
jagaugga 0
epic win. jk
tams_fml 0
Awkward moment... XD
Darling_Darkling 0
is it weird that i would find it hilarious and cute if my boyfriend said that to me? xP
gigirules19 0
Reminds me of the time I was trying to show off on a message and I left saying "Mmmmm...I have to go guys, I can smell the odour of my mum's cooking"
kennington 0
don't be a nerd when complimenting someone. ewww.
RyanKaufman 7
Because complimenting someone is so very hard you have to plan it out.
somethingawesome 9
I'm sorry but that is so funny.