Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML
Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
twiztedone 19
Mentos! They work wonders!
mclauren29 22
Does his cats breath smell like cat food?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (61)
twiztedone 19
Mentos! They work wonders!
andyyroxx 20
Or, get drunk off your mind and have a near death experience with a pack of gum!
dmoran20 27
Ahhh mentos, they would be purrrrrfect!
GoodLookingGeese 10
With coke even better ;)
mclauren29 22
Does his cats breath smell like cat food?
zingline89 18
"My doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there."
deBlobX 12
^Um...what does that have to do with this FML?
fml121785 14
Funny what comes to mind when people read this. I was wondering like MEOW cat or like.... ummm pussy...cat?
yoursucklives 36
those are ralph wiggum references ;)
zingline89 18
20, 38 is right, 2's post was a ralph wiggum quote, so I just followed it up with my own ralph quote. Guess you gotta be a fan of early Simpsons episodes to get it.
Catkam623 27
33 what I thought of was the boyfriend asking are you cheating on me with my cat;)
Palirose 22
Just take it with a pinch of salt and go and brush your teeth, floss, and use mouth wash. We all have our moments when our breath isn't so fresh.
perdix 31
Can salt freshen your breath? Sounds like a high-sodium cure.
LMFAOwned 9
Orbit. For a good, clean feeling.
GTAmax99 12
No matter what!
GothickNihilist 15
Fabulous.
DanielleinDC 34
No matter what! OP, your boyfriend has piss-poor timing. But you might want to get things checked out if have continual bad breath.
mega20913 8
OR.....maybe the scent of his cats is stuck in his nose
ks23 9
Brush your teeth then.
DragonText 4
Well at least he let you know, he could've just avoided you or something. And let you go the whole day with cat breath
Alleged_Cranium 7
Pussy breath?
qirde_15 5
therefore, your breath smells like a quiff
CharresBarkrey 16
What the **** is a quiff? That's not even phonetic. It's 'queef.'
GothickNihilist 15
Actually in certain languages, the letter I is pronounced E. I know quiff, would sound like queef in Japanese. The more you know. ;-)
HannahLouise96 13
Isn't a quiff a hairstyle? 0_0
HannahLouise96 13
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quiff No, quiff is most certainly a hairstyle. Still, I don't know what the average quiff smells like.... XD
sens3sfailing 25
30- no you are wrong...just, wrong. I's make the hard "i" sound in some situations in japanese. see: hai (pronounced like hi), samurai, and others. it makes an e sound in other words, but it does both
Marcelb 17
The I is prounounced like E in several languages (don't know about Japanese myself), as said before. For instance in French and my native language Dutch.
ThatPlankton 15
Would you want to listen to him If his breath smelled like that? Didn't think so.