Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I told her that I'd never watched The Lion King. FML
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML
Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I finally watched Toy Story 3; I ended up crying when the toys almost die. After the movie, my girlfriend broke up with me because I embarrassed her. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me for starting to give him oral sex because I wasn't paying attention to the Marvel movie he was showing me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML
Today, I went on a date. I'm a big Disney fan, so naturally the topic came up. He said, "The only Disney movie I didn't really like was Pocahontas." I have a Pocahontas tattoo. FML
Today, my girlfriend was finally in the mood, when all of a sudden I start hearing loud demands for Elmo. By the time I got the movie started for my son, my girlfriend was completely asleep, in her négligée. FML
Today, while babysitting a young girl, I put on the movie Bambi, as she told me it was her favorite movie. I didn't know that her parents always skipped the scene where Bambi's mom dies. Despite my attempts to comfort her, she was still upset when her parents returned. Her mom blamed me. FML
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Top comments
def10nes 0
Your life doesn't suck. You have someone that wants to watch a fun, charming movie with you. Appreciate your lady ... you have one. The meaning of life isn't sex.
LiishaNiinahx 0
disney movies are amazing ;D <3
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Comments (138)
LaNaesBeautieee 0
lmfaoooo
joce445 0
Damn Disney!
lilykat84 4
Disney movies > sex everytime. accept and move on. :P
amerwin 3
larry1511, I don't think I've read one comment by you that didn't make me want to catch you under the chin with an upward elbow strike.
mrahhhhh 21
She obviously got tired of your frog during sex, so she wants to see a new one. Bring that princess over to my place. I'll show Beauty my Beast ;).
sanitizzer 0
haha I accually laughed at this one
BoyFromTheFuture 0
Disney role-play FTW!
chasadilla 0
leü-zür...
surferchick96 0
getting frisky in the kitchen is dangerous.
mountneer 0
watch the movie while you have sex. you could make a game of it, like every time a fairy godmother comes on the screen she gets donkey punched.
jakeisawake 3
Better yet; everytime they start to sing, see who can finish before the song is over. Donkey punching wouldn't be necessary.
mountneer 0
did I go too far with the donkey punching? I always do that.
jakeisawake 3
Nah, I guess if she's not tense enough a good smack in the head will do it.