Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I told her that I'd never watched The Lion King. FML
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML
Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I finally watched Toy Story 3; I ended up crying when the toys almost die. After the movie, my girlfriend broke up with me because I embarrassed her. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me for starting to give him oral sex because I wasn't paying attention to the Marvel movie he was showing me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML
Today, I went on a date. I'm a big Disney fan, so naturally the topic came up. He said, "The only Disney movie I didn't really like was Pocahontas." I have a Pocahontas tattoo. FML
Today, my girlfriend was finally in the mood, when all of a sudden I start hearing loud demands for Elmo. By the time I got the movie started for my son, my girlfriend was completely asleep, in her négligée. FML
Today, while babysitting a young girl, I put on the movie Bambi, as she told me it was her favorite movie. I didn't know that her parents always skipped the scene where Bambi's mom dies. Despite my attempts to comfort her, she was still upset when her parents returned. Her mom blamed me. FML
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Top comments
def10nes 0
Your life doesn't suck. You have someone that wants to watch a fun, charming movie with you. Appreciate your lady ... you have one. The meaning of life isn't sex.
LiishaNiinahx 0
disney movies are amazing ;D <3
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Comments (138)
canadian_ftw 8
an intimacy post... and your life sucks has 69 votes :D
harry_potter_luv 0
90 :P
canadian_ftw 8
ah your username is a win, I'm watching the 6th one now :P and it was 69 when I posted the comment :D
KVKdragon 26
well, look at it this way. you can strengthen your love for each other even further by watching the beautiful love between Tiana and Naveen. it really is a touching love story :) (even if it's fictional)
boopityboppity 11
I can think of one love story of which I know that is not fictional. Countless are.
generalasskicker 12
hmm does it count if it's based on truth
cdatribe23 0
Disney, reallly haha sucks dude lol
mintcar 10
It's one night, get over it. Disney movies are awesome. Suck it up.
wombledn 0
you can't get laid after watching a romantic comedy and you cooking? you suck OP
mb7212004 0
are you dating a 7 year old?
fullmetalshrimp 0
Disney movie > sex. I guess it depends on how good you are in bed.
honeybee366 0
agreed! if you were better in bed, she'd want you over the movie. step it up!!
miSsFlien 15
LOL. dude, cut the crap! Walt Disney films are epic! After that you can jump in bed or something. Disney Classics before sex )):
BradenLock 4
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!
CallMeHush 1
I'd be hopping mad too!
boopityboppity 11
I'd be royally pissed!
djmigues 7
I see what the two of you did there.