Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was driving home from work when I saw the woman in the car in front of me throw something out the window. Only when it landed on my windshield did I realize what it was. A bloody tampon. FML
The gift
Today, someone left a used condom under the windshield wiper of my car. I didn't notice it until I was driving. And it was raining. It was even tied, so the contents couldn't leak out. I'm not planning artificial insemination anytime soon, but thanks for the thought. Man, I love college. FML
Road rage gone feral
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML
Why would you stick that there?
Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML
Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML
Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML
Move!
Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML
Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML
Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Emotional rollercoaster
Today, I found $20 under my car seat, so I put it in the cup holder, only for it to fly out of the window while going down the highway. FML
Top comments
PlasticShark 0
today's going to be sunny with light semen showers
Serial 2
at least you weren't driving a convertible
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Comments (271)
pinguinos2011 0
you should have written down their license plates and called the police on them for littering!That is just nauseating!!
CryingHowls 0
sorry i couldn't resist but... imagine if you were riding a motorcycle or a bike and the condom hits u...in the face >
Ohnoitslindsay 0
This seems incredibly fake. No one is actually dumb enough to have sex while driving with traffic around. Right? ... Right? -5 Faith in Humanity
skor_fml 0
At least you didn't have your head out the window like a dog.
liuken 3
Windsheild fluid?! Window Wipers?! Squeegie! SOMETHING?! Haha you should have gone to some place that cleans your windows for you when you fill up on gas. "Today, I work at a gas station and I had to squeegie a used condom off some jerks car. Fml."
Jasper_fml 0
ewwww. sick.
sugarbushvermont 0
yuck
Patchesdm 0
dude! I would be pissed. thats disgusting. You're probably pissed at them. just like this guy. check it out. http://www.whycindywhy.com/?id=ojfncllgl6wcs0uwpk5tav9tlmmf
epicfail11 0
#151 ok really your so dumb that you couldn't come up with the conclusion that mabye it wasn't the driver, mabye there was more than two people in the car. Or that the guy forgot to throw the condom away and that he did it then, god some people are clueless. And #152 who sticks their head out the window while driving???
BannedDistress78 0
you shouldve pulled over and make sure it was semen by touching it with your finger and tasting it. if it wasnt. thats good. and if it was then.............