Today, I was complimented on how big my penis was. I was complimented by the guy peeing next to me in the men's restroom at McDonald's. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML
What the actual ****?
Today, I went to dinner with my friend and his family. I went to the men's room at the same time as his father, and as we peed next to each other in adjacent urinals the father looked over at me and said, "Don't worry, I've seen smaller." FML
Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
Close encounters
Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML
Today, I went into the women's bathroom and was warmly greeted by a man masturbating on one of the sinks. FML
Seeing the sights
Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML
Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML
Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML
Top comments
Livinia 11
Would you rather him give you a random hand job?
alicianoar 7
Congrats on the big penis bro.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (331)
MissBoo111 21
I need pics to second that motion lol! I was also eating mcdonalds while reading the post lol!
HomeAl0ne 20
"I'd like a tossed salad to go with my quarter pounder thanks."
neonpanda44 0
at least it's big:)
maddy1028 0
awesome
immja 0
I thot shoppers were at burgerking..?
sankyu16 0
be proud!
I3atman 0
Some people just don't know how to take a compliment
Chrispayne 4
Was he at least cute?
carmenm 6
why exactly are you complaining about having a big penis get over it
TheDrummingResul 0
Creepy, but nice nonetheless.