Anonymous
Middleton, United States
Today, I was chased out of my own house by my wife's lover's dog. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
anyonmus
Westminster, United States
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Anonymous
Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Anonymous
Dogs rule
Today, my wife kicked me out of my own bed to go and sleep on the sofa because the dog was whining, and would only stop if she was allowed to sleep on my side of the bed. My wife would rather sleep with the dog than me. FML
Dammit
United States
Bad boy
Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I had to chase my dog all the way down the street, watching in horror as she proudly showed all of my neighbors my bra. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML
Maude
Beauharnois, Canada
Doggy dog world
Today, I was going for a relaxing walk but my dog broke free from his leash. At the same time, my 80 year-old neighbor was leaving her apartment. My dog ran inside her home and she screamed. I ended up in her bedroom, running around her bed, chasing my dog who was trying to get at her pantyhose. FML
Anonymous
Kennesaw, United States
Today, I got home and found my wife cuddling with the dog and our new kitten. Both the cat and my wife hissed at me when I tried to join in. FML
an unlucky man
Simi Valley, United States
Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML
Top comments
iAlissa 34
It saddens me that actual loyalty seems so hard to come by now.
Welshite 40
Your wife is in the doghouse now.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
russell61 0
Yea the really sucks not to bight are you.
ballbags 14
Talk about given a bone.
PropelledFeline 5
I hope you called the cops on him. If your name is on the papers for the house I'd use the law to help get revenge if I were you.
crabit_fml 11
Your American and on your own property shoot the dog, save face and make your point at the same time!!
wvcheesehead 13
This should have read "I was arrested for shooting a man I found in my wife's bed, and his little dog too"
goaskdad 3
And a plea of justifiable homicide would be entered and won by a competent attorney.
Kyp_kingofhearts 12
Kill the dog
cad4pwner 10
Bro... Its YOUR house assert your dominance as the alpha male. 1. Kill that damn dog. 2. Pick up dead dog and beat your wifes lover half to death with it. 3. Walk up to wife pick her up toss her on bed and assert your dominance;) you know what i mean. 4. Watch the horror in the eyes of the guy whose pet you killed. 5. **** the dog. 6. Victory lap around the crying bastard.
goaskdad 3
I like the way you think.
Tsukiyomi 16
Damn, OP If I was there I would have drop kicked the guy out a window
nick3600 22
There is so much wrong with this
zykrithium 22
He... he brought his dog over? The ****? That... that sucks OP. Pretty funny... but sucks.