Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Thought crime
Today, while babysitting a 9-year-old boy, I stubbed my toe on a coffee table. I yelled, "SON OF A…" but managed to stop myself before saying the last part. The boy yelled, "You were gonna say bitch! I'm telling mom and dad!" and, despite my desperate attempts to dissuade him, he did just that. Guess who's fired. FML
You ******* idiot
Today, I was babysitting with my best friend, watching my one-year-old cousin. We thought it would be funny to say a bunch of swear words in front of him, since he didn't know how to talk. Five minutes later, guess what his first word was? And guess who won't be invited over for a while? FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
Shouldn't have worn a thong...
Today, while shopping at my local grocery store, a young boy came up behind me and pulled my pants down while snickering. I was so shocked and horrified that I dropped the f-bomb. His mother yelled at me for "ruining his innocence". FML
Dream baby dream
Today, I had to babysit a 9 year-old girl. I hadn't slept for almost 40 hours and fell half-asleep while sitting on her couch for two minutes. She asked me something, but I thought it was a dream and answered with, "Your mom's a hoe." When I woke up, I realized I'd said it out loud instead of in my head. FML
Parroting
Today, my toddler repeated a very inappropriate word I'd said when I'd stubbed my toe. He chose to do this in the middle of a crowded supermarket, loudly, and repeatedly. Now the whole town probably thinks I have questionable parenting skills. FML
Proportional response
Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML
Brat era
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Learning moment
Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML
Top comments
Doortje 30
Ohhh she's going to **** you up. Teaching a little kid words like that, how ******* dare you?
juturnaamo 29
Accidentally stub your toe. Say Grosh! Or something equally silly. Act stunned and say 'Please don't tell your mom I said Grosh! Im in so much Groshing trouble...'
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Comments (108)
leh9 2
Same thing happened to me just fake cry until he promises to stop saying it then praise him when he does
domking1315 20
**** that
anorexicbarbie 8
Wow OP, I understand one bad word being muttered under your breath, but a string of words is very unnecessary for just dropping something. Have a little more self control, especially around kids. It's not that hard.
iliketurtels 0
Looool
aardvarkish 17
What the **** is a Fbomb?
iliketurtels 0
It's kind of your fault for swearing in front of a toddler, now he is scarred for life. Well done :/
SatisfiedSmiles 0
That happended to me but not as bad my friend was babysitting with me and she said oopsie poopsie and now the kid is playing with playdough and screaming oopsie poopsie at the top of his lungs as his mom comes back upstairs
margie4peace 11
"happended"? This post has so many grammatical errors, I'm going to rewrite it for you: "This happened to me, but not as bad. My friend was babysitting with me and she said 'oopsie poopsie'. The kid started screaming it at the top of his lungs, just as his mom came back." Remember, it's important to stay in school! :-)
maui3 0
Yep!!!!! Blame the TV. Well maybe not cuz then you have to explain why you were watching the movie Scarface and not Sponge Bob.
belkinbra 12
Just do what the vatican does to keep kids quiet. Buy him ice cream and tell him if he tells anyone Jesus will kill his mom.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
Very eloquently put.