Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
Today, I was babysitting with my best friend, watching my one-year-old cousin. We thought it would be funny to say a bunch of swear words in front of him, since he didn't know how to talk. Five minutes later, guess what his first word was? And guess who won't be invited over for a while? FML
Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML
Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML
Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML
Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML
Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
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Top comments
shaaza 16
Gotta control your tongue and mind when you're with kids my friend.
A_Troll_Account 3
Ydi for saying words such as that around a child
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Comments (34)
A_Troll_Account 3
Ydi for saying words such as that around a child
cheeeksss 29
For those jumping down OP's throat saying "YDI for swearing in front of kids" blahblah.. So you're telling me that out of anger or spur of the moment, you have never once in your life slipped a cuss word while a child was nearby? If the little brother was old enough to know it wasn't appropriate, then he is old enough to learn how to and when to use swear words. You don't protect children by keeping them ignorant. You protect them by educating them.
Andrewx8 12
I dont swear myself, at all... I know thats hard to believe, but people like me exist. For the record, im 23.
shaaza 16
Gotta control your tongue and mind when you're with kids my friend.
MadCabin 3
cant let road rage get to you man
RichardPencil 32
That's how my daughter learned the word "asshole!" They ought to make those child safety seats soundproof, too!
J352SAURUS 30
"Chicken in the hole!"
redcode5 17
Rip, well you walked into that one.
badassmf1234 22
Yeah, children can't keep secrets. If they hear it, they're going to repeat it.
DelugeandDrought 7
I think you've learned two things here: 1. Don't curse in front of children. 2. Don't beat your little brother at video games. He sounds very competitive as well. A four letter word to describe someone who takes competition this far comes to mind, but you just never know who's going to read these, so I'll leave it up to reader interpretation.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Just the first one, it's not his fault his brother's a sore loser and resorts to getting him in trouble just because he beat him in a video game.
DelugeandDrought 7
You're completely correct. I should have thought about putting a note that was meant to be sarcastic.
Sonjuro 7
Completely off topic, but is anyone else getting annoyed with the video ad at the top of the page? Have video ads, fine, but at least make them static like the others. The random expanding/collapsing is driving me nuts.
species4872 20
Addblock
stretch101 14
I'm going to say Your Life Sucks. Plenty of places he could have heard that word not just from you, such as quite a bit of the stuff called "music", played on the radio. But still try to watch what you say around him in future to be on the safe side.
randomuser15 14
Learned*