Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML
Today, while standing in line at the store, I thought I could let a small fart slip and blame it on the guy behind me. I did it, then turned to glare at him in disgust, only for him to turn and yell at the crowd, “This bitch farted, not me!” FML
Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML
Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML
Today, I was waiting in line at the store trying to hold in a fart. I get to the cash register and the lady made me laugh and the fart slipped out. Only it was much louder than it was supposed to be, because I was squeezing my butt cheeks together, so it made a clapping sound. It was heard. FML
Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public, she needed to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML
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Top comments
people_annoy_me 23
That's kinda funny. You should have said it was you though, then slapped the lady for slapping her kid.
chris4u2nv5 19
Sucks to be the kid!!!
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Comments (175)
pawelthink 14
I'd say it's wrong, but I would not say a word myself
Urpoppy 21
I literally laughed out loud.
sabine123_fml 5
Did u set her straight
Blippety 23
Why all the YDIs? They did say they had really bad gas and *accidentally* let one off. It's not like it was OP's fault or he was trying to get the kid in trouble.
bryan788 29
sounds the kid had a better FML to post. today someone fart in line and my mom smacked me fml
eRapper69 10
How does that suck? That's freaking awesome!!
Bethxx 6
You should have owned up
dave122345 9
Should have told her it was you then get slapped by the mom or get lectured by her about doing that in public.
Nvyda 5
In response to the folks saying the mother was being abusive; I got my ass beat for plenty of shit I didn't do as a child, and even more shit I did do. The boy will live. Read "A Child Called 'It'". That's child abuse, not a a cuff around the ear.
jmaxmarsh 9
Nice word choice!