Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML
Today, while standing in line at the store, I thought I could let a small fart slip and blame it on the guy behind me. I did it, then turned to glare at him in disgust, only for him to turn and yell at the crowd, “This bitch farted, not me!” FML
Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML
Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML
Today, I was waiting in line at the store trying to hold in a fart. I get to the cash register and the lady made me laugh and the fart slipped out. Only it was much louder than it was supposed to be, because I was squeezing my butt cheeks together, so it made a clapping sound. It was heard. FML
Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public, she needed to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML
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Top comments
people_annoy_me 23
That's kinda funny. You should have said it was you though, then slapped the lady for slapping her kid.
chris4u2nv5 19
Sucks to be the kid!!!
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Comments (175)
crawlnstall 11
That's a win in my book
devention 6
Less of a "your life sucks"and more of a "his life sucks". Reminds me of that scene in A Christmas Story where Ralphie's friend gets his ass beat for getting reneged on for something he didn't do.
caleb_9756 14
We'll that must have really "stunk" for the kid.
kailarahne 19
That is freaking hilarious.
cheetos5 6
I would say that is more of a win
thenamesjan 13
At least she didn't think it was you :)
Realhomesley 5
Off the hook!!!
Solano2580 24
File a child abuse report to protective services, if a slap was for farting..imagine what she does to him at home.....
Samuel5463 12
Lol
Enchiladattack 12
Today, I was at the grocery store with my mother. While waiting in the checkout, Someone farted rather loudly. My mother, thinking it was me, smacked me for farting in public. I still don't know who farted. FML