Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me, "Have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "You mean with other people?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML
Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML
Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML
Today, I went to a new doctor. While filling out charts she looked up and said, "I'm assuming you are single." FML
Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML
Today, I called a doctor's office for a referral. I was in public, so when she asked me what type of issue I had, I mumbled that I had a vaginal issue. After painstakingly having to repeat this several times, she said she was asking what kind of insurance I have. FML
Today, I've been having persistent fungal infections and was getting treated by a male gynecologist. I had to go in to give vaginal swab tests. I washed and cleaned before I left, but when I got on the doctor's table I already had so much discharge. The doctor asked, "Is it the medicine?" I had to say no. FML
Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML
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Top comments
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
"No, 'lefty' doesn't count. If you ever do, use a condom."
Zynris 10
Judging by your comment and profile picture, I am just going to assume you are white trash.
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Comments (119)
Tehalon 0
My docter has never asked me that and im 23 and totalleh hot. Or is it just an american thing to ask that?
saylajay 1
No
Zynris 10
Judging by your comment and profile picture, I am just going to assume you are white trash.
sleepless15_p 0
you are stupid. Accept it
th3rapy 0
LOL. Usually, when I read FML submissions about speaking before thinking, I vote "you deserved it," but ... for this ... all I have is sympathy. LoL. Sorry your life sucks. :P
Theoderage 3
BWAHAHA I agree with #14 Oh, and #12- wtf?
tehhotness 0
I agree with #9, we aren't in third grade people.
laxgirl3 0
oh yeah how do u no tht...?
threeOHthree 0
im with 9.
mysitc_burrito 0
I say the same thing, but I'm a smartass and use it to try and avoid being asked "is it possible you are pregnant?" by my doctor fifty million times.
Kitten125 0
Hahaha. So I guess thats a no? I feel so bad for you.... ;3
Jcsati8 0
Hey OP, when the doc asked if you had sexual relations HE DID NOT MEAN WITH YOUR RIGHT HAND AND A TUB OF VASELINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YDI, Retard
LoganBballin16 0
you took it way to far!
kcmjlopez 0
Yeah come on, rub some salt in an open wound. Too much.
Miss_Whipped 43
Because people who get it on with tubs of Vaseline are automatically handicapped mentally. Gotcha.
chelseybuns 0
Omfg! YOUR ******. the docter probally thinks your some kind of loser....! I am a docter and if someone said that i could not kepp a striaght face! haha. That's so sad!