Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me, "Have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "You mean with other people?" FML
Today, I overheard a coworker talking about going to what sounded like a dentist's appointment. As she left later, I jokingly said, "Remember to open wide!" Turned out her appointment was with her OB/GYN, not a dentist. FML
Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML
Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML
Today, I went to my GP to discuss my anxiety. As I was explaining my symptoms, I accidentally farted loudly due to my nervousness. The doctor paused and said, "Well, let's address that as well." FML.
Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML
Today, it was my first day at my new job as a receptionist at a small doctor's office. When the doctor's wife called and asked if he'd stepped out, I blanked the word "Doctor" and instead replaced it with, "Medicine man." FML
Today, I answered a call I thought was from my friend and opened with, “What do you want, fuck face?” It was actually my dentist confirming my appointment. There was a long pause before she politely repeated my name to ensure they had the right patient. FML
Today, I went to a new doctor. While filling out charts she looked up and said, "I'm assuming you are single." FML
Today, I was at working at Burger King as a cashier. A girl I met last night came in and said, "Aren't you that guy from last night?" Last night, I had told her I was going to medical school and was going to be a doctor in less than a year. FML
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Top comments
Nederlander95 14
That's when you offer to help get her loose and ready beforehand
classiceagle63 16
Now only to over come awkwardness and awkward silence.
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Comments (104)
Nederlander95 14
That's when you offer to help get her loose and ready beforehand
cryssycakesx3 23
what do you suggest she uses on her?
the_truth_lives 9
Well that escalated quickly.
BBlah 26
That would just make it more awkward, OP is a girl
billiejoeinabox 7
Who the hell came up with the whole "vaginas become loose after sex" bullshit? Vaginas go back to normal size after birth. That little toothpick you call your penis (Which OP likely doesn't even have) doesn't do anything to the size of it.
Joshwarrior 39
Billie why so bent out of shape over a comment? lol maybe you need a toothpick inside you in order to losen up.
MortenM 17
#57 she could offer her a hand to loosen up
EnderWolf1013 9
shut up josh
buckdharma 38
57- Perhaps a Pabst beer before her pap smear.
xsydneyx123 28
#65.. Lesbians exist. We aren't unicorns.
GRubi 17
True, though it was kind of odd for #1 to just assume OP is a lesbian since the odds are relatively low.
Psufans 7
How do you know OPs a girl?
incoherentrmblr 22
Look up in the upper left hand corner next to the title of the FML, if on mobile device...
cgart96 15
Unicorns exist. I refuse to believe any different.
Nicholas12 15
second
ComoEsJuan 24
You must be new here.
sayyestothedress 24
We don't give a shit!
sayyestothedress 24
Lol, you made my day
Kayaytea 18
Congratulations?
classiceagle63 16
Now only to over come awkwardness and awkward silence.
Lebeaugars95 20
ask her if you can help her study for her gyno exam
SaintJupiter 16
Oh gosh. It happens to the best of us though mate. No worries.
flamingice13 11
yeah stay away from her :p
MidnaLink 35
Why?
MidnaLink 35
I was thinking more the second one, but I was more flustered that he'd said that.
Jst4kicks 16
I agree with #1... you'll feel comfortable sooner or later.
gunda95 11
Smooth, you should have finished with, "Why go to the doctor; when I can check for you tonight!" ;)
garebear61 14
Don't forget to mention that appointments with you are much more affordable OP. :)
PewDiePie_Lover 14
because OP is a girl.
NoMore_CoolNames 14
#74- And your point is???
just1n12 18
That would be great #7 if OP was a guy :p Which she is not.
DonkeyTeeth2013 22
Everyone has those moments, just keep trying and you'll get better at it.
boating_guy 33
It's all right, that would have been WAY more awkward and worse if you were a guy
DonkeyTeeth2013 22
OP says nothing about his/her gender
iiMichy 19
It shows the female symbol beside OPs user name
AndreaJanell 15
OP's a girl...
RedPillSucks 33
The OPs gender symbol is on the app and the website
AmexBlack 24
Her gender is displayed next to her name..
beelee1988 13
How many more ways can we say OP is a female until you think he finally gets it? Lol
gracehi 33
OP is a person of the non-male gender. See, 39? There was at least one more way.
killinpoptarts 9
OP does not have a male sex organ. Also OP can procreate with someone of the male gender.
newzealand 28
Agreed, but sometimes a little YOLO goes a long way. Being fully serious about it though, you have to want to have a good time and commit!!
cryssycakesx3 23
54, ....what??
slyde32 12
is there a way I can downvote more than once? I don't feel giving one downvote per person is enough for yolo being used
ZombieGirl95 13
I would have asked the same thing haha