Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my parents got back from their weekend ski trip. I had a few parties over the weekend and had cleaned up absolutely EVERYTHING; beer cans, throw up, spilled drinks, etc. The only thing I forgot about was the condom someone left in my parents bed. FML
Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML
Today, I went into my parents room to empty their wastebasket. Next to it and around their bed, I found tissues that were soaked in an unknown sticky substance. I had to pick them up. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom. On my way back, I found a small piece of trash in the hallway so I picked it up. It was cat poop. FML
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML
Today, I’m pet-sitting for my parents while they’re on vacation. So far, one cat has projectile vomited all over the living room, and another has pooped in their bed. Twice. My parents were not concerned when I called, and said this is normal behavior. FML
Today, my cat looked like it was about to puke, so I put him outside. Unhappy with the situation, he leaped on to the kitchen window ledge and squeezed in through the open window, only to projectile-vomit mid-leap all over the kitchen counter. I found a hairball in the butter. FML
Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
YDI if it was your condom. And why spend so much time in your parent’s bed? Don’t you have your own bed? It just seems creepy to me.
rainbowdonnareed 18
Oh and clean up the cat vomit
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Comments (4)
Chazzster 32
YDI if it was your condom. And why spend so much time in your parent’s bed? Don’t you have your own bed? It just seems creepy to me.
slkeithh 14
I mean I'm 28 and when I'm watching the animals when my mother is gone, I use her room. Giant bedroom, giant bed, giant attached bathroom. Not sure what the question is here.
Danielle Zion Gadsden 15
I'm 33. To this day if my parents are out of town they know I'm sleeping in their bed. With their permission. It's just something we do.
rainbowdonnareed 18
So what you're saying is you had several in your parents bed? How old are you?!
rainbowdonnareed 18
Oh and clean up the cat vomit