Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my parents were ecstatic about sending me to an amazingly fun camp. I didn't know until I got there that it was a fat camp. FML
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, my seven-year-old told me to lose weight. Her reason? There's a family fun day coming up at her school and she is embarrassed. FML
Today, I had to babysit a 9 year-old girl. I hadn't slept for almost 40 hours and fell half-asleep while sitting on her couch for two minutes. She asked me something, but I thought it was a dream and answered with, "Your mom's a hoe." When I woke up, I realized I'd said it out loud instead of in my head. FML
Today, my seven-year-old sister came to stay at my house for the night. She usually just sleepwalks. But tonight she sleep-peed in my clean clothes basket. FML
Today, I took my 6 year old son to meet our new neighbours. When we got home he packed his bags and headed for the door. Once he reached the door, I asked where he was going. He replied, "To the neighbours'. They have a bigger television." FML
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friend's house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML
Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML
Today, I woke up in my friend's living room after our sleepover. I heard her hot older brother and his friends in the kitchen. Feeling confident, I exposed my midriff a little bit just to give them a peek. They groaned and threw a blanket over me. FML
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Top comments
peve3 12
She's nine, so I'd just ignore her. If she's really annoying, say yes and tell her you'll send her a brochure for next year.
Trix_Disorder 20
Cousin. 9-year-old cousin. Reading comprehension, I swear. Goes right out the window when you're trying to get that first comment, huh?
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Comments (105)
CaptainDoorknob 7
Kids say the darndest things :')
Welshite 40
There's cute, and then there's just plain insulting.
LlamaUprising 10
I'm just going to follow your picture..
CaptainDoorknob 7
17 - Where in my comment do I hint that I have a mental deficiency? Nicetrybro.
Futacy 30
Send him to brat camp.
thiscrazything 1
That's pretty mean, even for a nine year old. Tomorrow nite, while she's sleeping in her bed, dip her hand into a bowl of warm water......
sens3sfailing 25
It's called the tests came back inconclusive because they were not able to get people's hands in water when they were asleep and keep them asleep except for Adam spilling the water from the bowl all over himself. The theory they have is that it in fact wouldn't cause you to pee, but they simply were not able to test it fully with any real results.
priceyfml 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Why are you sleeping over a friends when you have a 9 yr old at home
CaptainDoorknob 7
Why are you assuming the kid's home alone? Fail.
MisterMichael 9
That's a really stupid question..
Trix_Disorder 20
Cousin. 9-year-old cousin. Reading comprehension, I swear. Goes right out the window when you're trying to get that first comment, huh?
gc327072 31
priceyfml, it appears your stupidity has cost you in votes.
minus20 4
This is why I hate Canadians
walmartpaysme 15
I wasn't aware I couldn't spend the night at a friends house when I had a younger relative at my house. Crap. I was a horrible sister.
gojira666 7
2- I read that the WRONG way.....
walmartpaysme 15
Ew, pedo!
peve3 12
She's nine, so I'd just ignore her. If she's really annoying, say yes and tell her you'll send her a brochure for next year.
AFloppyWetWhale 6
LMFAO I just favorites this fml just for this comment XD
lexi365 20
That's kind of harsh to do to a 9 year old.
walmartpaysme 15
That was only if she didn't shut up about it. Nine year olds are not babies. They know better than to talk to people like that.
patrickalamo 48
Say, No, I've packed my bags because I plan on kicking your ass for the next week straight and needed a change of cloths during the breaks.
EmoSquirrel 7
9 year olds are little demons sometimes..
stiansr 8
Kids these days
rocklare18 7
I have sleep over and Im also prepared with my "bags of stuff", I also sneak my mothers "vase" in my back pack for a science project.
vocaloidtiger 12
71 ~ ... What?
CaptainDoorknob 7
72 - Kindly translate that to English for the rest of civilized humanity to understand..
Dracoboxer357 36
Now that's just mean. :p Ignore the child, Op. If you're happy the way you are, lean or otherwise, than that's all that matters. ;P
walmartpaysme 15
Then. Damn it. Not than then!
Dracoboxer357 36
54- Argh, dammit! You are correct, and for this, I must be punished! Here, beat me with this rainbow trout, it will do us both some good. ;P
xNephilim 19
That's a bullshit excuse for fat people to think it's perfectly fine to be fat. It's not. Yeah, you can still be a wonderful person when you're fat, but IT IS NOT OK. It's unhealthy. Clogged arteries, diabetes, increased risk of heart conditions, inability to perform certain tasks a normal person would be able to do... That's what being fat does to you. It is NOT ok.
sens3sfailing 25
It's also not your body, and not everyone sees okay the same way you do. Some times people need to be told that they are beautiful no matter how much weight they have on them or lack there of of said weight. They are beautiful people because they are perfectly normal, it may not be healthy but nobody ever claims it is healthy. Telling a person this stuff is not news to them, especially over FML, and won't cause any revelations in their lifestyle. So in short, no, it isn't healthy to be overweight/underweight, but if it is in a reasonable manner, to where you are literally killing yourself with the issue, it is okay. Beauty is never only skin deep.
TehCezar 5
#68 Thank you!!! So many people spout the "beauty is on the inside" bullshit that they don't understand being overweight is a DISEASE.
iHeartRKO 5
So is being underweight, which to me looks way more disgusting than being overweight. Some people are just too shallow to see it other ways
Dracoboxer357 36
81- I understand very much that being over weight is a disease. I used to fall into the Obese category until a few years ago and I was fat growing up as a kid, but on top of being fat, I was depressed and Wasn't happy with myself at all: Over weight isn't healthy, for sure, but neither's growing up hating every inch of yourself because of other people's standards labeling you disgusting and being made to feel that was who and what you are. IF Op is over weight, and it doesn't actually Say that she actually is, I would happily recommend a routine of diet and exercise, but I'd also like to boost her psyche to accept herself first, because as you pointed out, beauty ISN'T only skin deep......it's how you feel about yourself. :(
Missusluv313 9
I hope a fat person punches you clear in the face.
walmartpaysme 15
I have a friend who has been big her while life. One year, she started working out, eating healthy, and cutting back on her food consumption. She lost sixty lbs and then she stopped. She was at 190. She kept trying to loose weight but her body just wouldn't. Some people are incapable of being skinny. People are not always fat by choice. There are also diseases and disorders which cause you to gain weight or to be unable to lose weight.
Dracoboxer357 36
93- I'm sorry you feel that way towards me. I don't hope anyone of any size hits you. :(
Dory123 9
Kids are just brutally honest. Sorry OP.
sheethapins 13
"Yes. I'm your chaperone."
Zedd_fml 8
Read it in Stewie's voice, worth it.
jujubunni5 9
So worth it.
blossomluv 0
Lol
krylonpony 3
Suddenly, personal memories from watching worlds biggest loser. Manly tears were shed.
petshark 4
rude!
3pi 6
Gotta love kids! Honest no matter what
walmartpaysme 15
That's not honesty. That's called being a smart ass.