Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML
Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML
Today, I was in the mall for the second day in a row with my 7-year-old brother. As we walked past Santa he asked me, "Why does Santa look different today"? Not thinking, I said, "Because each mall has a different Santa." FML
Today, I brought my 6-year-old to the mall to sit on Santa's lap. She told him what she wanted and smiled for the picture. When the lady told her that her turn was over, she began throwing a fit, pulling off Santa's beard in the process. This caused all the kids in line to begin sobbing. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to an old man with a white beard and a red sweater because she thought he might be Santa. He was a homeless dude, drunk at 9 in the morning. He told her to either give him money or f**k off, then screamed at her that "Santa’s not real, grow up r*tard." She’s still crying FML
Today, my 8-year-old daughter was throwing a tantrum, and I said "Keep this up and I'll tell Santa to take your presents back." She told me I don't even know Santa, at which point I accidentally blurted that I'm "Santa". FML
Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML
Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML
Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML
Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML
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Top comments
desoto96 9
Nope he's not. Just like your rack.
insertnameherr 11
HE'S NOT REAL???
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Comments (145)
spikekutter 9
what a ho..
SmoothSeth 10
I am guessing that kid has been on the naughty list for a while.
livewire1701 8
That's what happens when you lie to kids. Someone eventually tells them the truth. YDI
Obey_StudBoii 23
If I were that childs parent I'd smack em behind the head for saying that.
ouimetnick 10
Childhood memories= destroyed
amazingamelia 4
i feel like i read this a couple days ago? no? maybe? lol
SamanthaCassieL 10
if it was my child who heard that, I would have said "that child was probably bad and doesn't believe because Santa didn't bring him gifts last year. and Santa and his elves are very busy right now and this is one of his helpers who is going to take your Christmas list to him in the north pole!" that way you explain why the kid yelled out and why he looks different.
Donovan_757 8
Better that kid than finding out "mommy" was a liar the while time!
Jordath_Fil 11
Come on you know you can turn this one around!!
ideasrule 13
The Santa story is nothing but a control mechanism used by parents to scare their kids into mindless obedience. He sees you when you're sleeping? He knows when you're awake? Seriously, who would tolerate such a complete invasion of privacy? Morality is what you do when nobody is watching. If you teach your kids to behave morally because of fear and not for the sake of being moral, something is seriously wrong with your parenting. The world is wonderful enough that there's no need to make things up. Tell kids about the thousands of exoplanets astronomers have discovered, or the origin of humans, or ancient civilizations. Maybe tell them about the fact that we live in the most prosperous and peaceful world that ever existed. Those are stories they'll never have to give up, because they're absolutely true.
brand2017 9
Can i live in your world? Cuz Earth ******* sucks. All the greedy politicians, pointless wars, squabbling over each other like maggots to claim the ranks of our businesses. Children turning into angsty little fuckhobits, etc. i can go on for hours. So either you arent from this planet or you're on some pretty awesome drugs. SHARE DAMMIT!
ideasrule 13
Some statistics: 1. In the last 20 years, the global poverty rate has fallen from 50% to 20% and continues to decrease. This is the fastest increase in prosperity the world has ever known. 2. The global homocide rate is now 6.9 per 100,000 per anum, down from 7.4 in 2004 and 10.4 in 1990 3. 3 of the world's 6 continents--North America, South America, and Europe--have no war amongst themselves and no famine, the first time in human history for which this has been true 4. The world is becoming increasingly democratic. As the fall of monarchies, dictatorships, and Communist regimes reveal (think Arab Spring), democracy is increasingly becoming the only legitimate form of government. 5. Today, the average person in the world lives in a rented apartment in a stable semi-democracy, with no possibility of war or famine and little possibility of being brutalized by the state. He has a phone, bikes or takes the bus to work, shops at well-stocked supermarkets, and watches TV at home. His country's economy is growing at an impressive rate, in excess of 5% a year, giving hope to a once-impoverished nation. He faces a bright future where global prosperity will be a reality, and global peace a real possibility.
brand2017 9
Mankind's very nature will prevent peace. It is in the nature of man to fight and seek power. Because of this, peace will be nearly impossible to achieve. It may sound pessimistic, but it is the truth. Our primal instincts are to fight, flee, and provide for ourselves and our families.
DanielleinDC 34
Yes, and this is different from religion how? That said, I'm sorry, OP, that your kid's Christmas was ruined by a little snotbag of a kid. Granted kids have to find out sometime, but preferably in a nicer way than that.