Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML
Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML
Today, I was in the mall for the second day in a row with my 7-year-old brother. As we walked past Santa he asked me, "Why does Santa look different today"? Not thinking, I said, "Because each mall has a different Santa." FML
Today, I brought my 6-year-old to the mall to sit on Santa's lap. She told him what she wanted and smiled for the picture. When the lady told her that her turn was over, she began throwing a fit, pulling off Santa's beard in the process. This caused all the kids in line to begin sobbing. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to an old man with a white beard and a red sweater because she thought he might be Santa. He was a homeless dude, drunk at 9 in the morning. He told her to either give him money or f**k off, then screamed at her that "Santa’s not real, grow up r*tard." She’s still crying FML
Today, my 8-year-old daughter was throwing a tantrum, and I said "Keep this up and I'll tell Santa to take your presents back." She told me I don't even know Santa, at which point I accidentally blurted that I'm "Santa". FML
Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML
Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML
Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML
Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
desoto96 9
Nope he's not. Just like your rack.
insertnameherr 11
HE'S NOT REAL???
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (145)
icychil 13
Well, if she asks, she doubts. Not too much harm done :) Or, then again, helping you to invent new fairy-tales (good for you).
LuckyLynx7732 5
Am I they only that finds it kind of messed up that OP got caught lying to his child and not many people think that is wrong? In fact, there are people now trying to help him continue the lie instead of telling him to be truthful.
dogpup4 23
It's just a bit of fun, I believed in Father Christmas when I was young and I'm glad I did.
lolo717 17
My parents always told us the ones at the malls were just Santas helpers, and they would just report back to Santa!
The_F3rris 11
Why do people keep the santa lie alive? Its so stupid and eventually you have to tell them the truth anyway. Then see how much your kid loves you.
TeddyB88 4
Should have yelled back that maybe that's why his parents gave him up for adoption and maybe for Christmas they'll send him a card
interesting33 37
I understand that people get upset because it is lying, but it isn't a harmful lie. When I was a child it was so magical - I loved it. But it is really up to your own opinions I think...
pntgirl95 14
I dint understand why more parents don't do what mine did to avoid this. Mall and other Santas aren't always the real one. He's very busy this time of year so it's his elf or his helper. We tell my brothers this.
GryffinDarkBreed 3
YDI for Lying to your kid in the first place
joe502 3
You then comment... That is correct sweetie, BUT that's because they are all his helpers... He is so busy I could not be down here... He is getting ready for the big night!!!! Just play it off.. People are just mean...
sugoine 12
Did you then explain that Santa has to have helpers because he can't be everywhere at once?