Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there, to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride: 1 - Getting Laid: 0. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got my girlfriend to play Smash Bros Brawl with me. As it was her first time, I set up handicaps to give her at least a shot at winning. She won, quite handily. A little irritated at this, I took off the handicaps and tried again. She beat me even faster. FML
Today, at a Con, I saw a girl in an impressive cosplay of a character from one of my favorite video games. I complimented her on her costume and got a picture with her. Later, my girlfriend called me a cheating creep and broke up with me. FML
Today, I find video games very unattractive and unmanly. I told a great guy that he had to choose between me and his video games, and he immediately told me he chose video games, then asked me to leave. Whatever, loser. FML
Today, it was supposed to be a big date day for my girlfriend and I. She really loves a specific video game, so I did what I thought was special on it. I learned the hard way that doing so ruined the entire day for her over the video game. FML
Today, my date took me to some sort of comic book/computer convention. I think he was trying to impress me with his online reputation, but it didn’t come across as tech suave, it was more nerd pathetic, the kind that makes vaginas go dry faster than a sand enema. I went home alone, bored. FML
Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML
Today, I had a gym date with a girl from Tinder. As soon as I saw her loading up the 45s, I knew I was in trouble. She could squat and leg-press over 100 lbs more than me on both. Somehow she let me come over that night anyway. I challenged her to a wrestling match to try and gain back my pride, then she made me tap out. FML
Today, I won a game of Monopoly against my girlfriend. She reacted by sweeping the board off the table, storming out the front door, and mowing down my mailbox driving away. FML
Today, my girlfriend beat me at ping pong, twenty to three. She said I let her win because I don't respect her, then stormed out of the room. I'm just really bad at ping pong. FML
Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML
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Top comments
IMB916 0
You took her to an arcade?! so u could beat her at all the games...? YDI
Xinabeth 0
I am going to say YDI. You shouldn't have "mercilessly dominated" her in the games; you should have let her win a couple at least (IMO).
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Comments (334)
plexico 4
You should have won all the games, but you should have kept them closer. It was probably the elaborate "I'm great - you suck" dances you did in the arcade after each game that sealed your fate (and her lips, all sets). Way back, I met a girl who said she could play racquetball, so we set up a date for that. I beat the shit out of her. I denied that I was drilling her in the ass with the ball, but she said I was doing it on purpose. (She was right. The game was getting boring and the sound of the ball smacking that butt gave me wood.) She went straight home after the game and we never talked agin. Moral of the story: You should win the games, but make it look competitive; you'll get more pussy that way and that's the REAL win anyway.
candiedcandice 0
I'll kick your ass at Tetris and in the bedroom. Sir, I iz challenging you to a duel. :) Wish you lived in Oregon! Sorry chick couldn't keep up. Her loss.
ILM_fml 0
There are girls that would love you for that, rare as they may be. I've dated a few girls like that, it's really just a modern version of that old instinct to be attracted to guys that have better "hunting" skills.
lologirl419 0
OH MY GOD, I love guys that take me out to play video games! A lot of guys think girls don't want to, but I'd love it!
giganticbrain 0
Wow. Great story. Thanks for sharing that with the rest of us, and in the process wasting a minute of my life.
lologirl419 0
If you're talking about my comment, you know, you didn't HAVE to read it... Sorry it wasn't interesting enough for you...
kristidgranger 3
guys and thier dang egos! so dumb!
XOfiestypixie 0
Like someone else said before, it also doesn't feel good to have someone "mercilessly dominate" you in every single game. Personally I don't like it when a guy lets me win, but I dislike it just as much when a guy goes all out as if he was playing with his friends, especially if I've never played the game before. I get the whole "don't let her win" thing, but at least go a *little* easier* so she won't feel stupid afterwards about being horribly destroyed at every game possible
Acacea 0
Why is this an FML? It was your decision to take her to the arcade and your decision to beat her at all the games and you seem proud of your choices. Your life isn't f'ed at all.
Edumacated 0
Props OP. You didn't pansy out just cause she's a girl. A good girl would appreciate that. My gf gets really annoyed when I always beat her in air hockey, pool, etc. But I'm not gonna play like crap just so she can win, cause she wouldn't want that either! If your girl was a good sport she could suggest other games/competitions that she knows she'd have a fighting chance in to even things out, cause sure, no one likes to lose all the time.
evil_teddy_bear 0
Games over girls. You chose wrong
joethebiden 8
Haha yeah... getting laid: 0 for the rest of your life.
3arl 0
not ur fault she sucked ass