Today, I told my girlfriend I needed someone to talk to because I just found out my aunt has cancer. She told me to talk to her in an hour, Spongebob was on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was working my shift at the store, my girlfriend appeared and asked to talk to me. Once we were alone, she burst into tears and started sobbing. Turns out someone's dad died in her favorite TV show and she wanted some comfort. FML
Today, my grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer. We're very close, and I called my boyfriend, really needing some support. I'd barely told him what had happened, when he replied, "Babe, I'm in the middle of a game here. Call me later." FML
Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for a romantic dinner, since we can't see each other this Valentine's Day. Halfway through, my aunt called, telling me my grandma had died. I had to leave because I was crying so much, leaving my girlfriend with a very pricey bill. FML
Today, I spilled my guts to my girlfriend, saying I'm scared that all I do is upset her. I then had to sit through a speech about how upset she was that I hadn't told her sooner. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, my wife, who recently had cancer, made an offhand comment that my 30-year-old sister took offense to. Instead of saying something, she went and called our parents. My dad then called and yelled at me for 5 minutes about it. FML
Today, my friend's dad had a heart attack. Without realizing what I was saying, I texted her, "If you need anything, you know I'll be there in a heartbeat." FML
Today, I bitched out my grandmother, who lives with my family, for being lazy and laying in bed until 6-7pm for the past month. When I was done, she told me she had been diagnosed with cancer and was depressed because of it. Nobody had bothered to tell me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
briedis 0
I love Spongebob :D But yeah, pretty insesitive girlfriend...
hpnerd 0
Spongebob is an hour long? Some girlfriend..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (175)
Miru_fml 0
A back-to-back showing of Spongebob must have meant there were new episodes.
wtfdidido 0
Probably a double extra special Spongebob showing! Can't ignore that. Anyways it's not like she told you she didn't feel like it or whatever she just really likes Spongebob.
heather_marie 0
Wow.. what a heartless bitch. & really, Spongebob? Dump her.
fml_seriouslyfml 0
I'm sorry about your aunt. I hope they caught it early and I hope she beats it! As far as your girlfriend... Did you tell her why you wanted to talk? I'm hoping it's just that she didn't know what was going on; if that's not the case, I'd say it's definitely time to move on.
Yayap_fml 0
Try holding a SpongeBob plushie hostage, that ought to get her attention.
aqua__marine 0
how old are you?
reset_button 0
YDI: That's what you get for picking up girls at the playground
draccon136 0
such a good show. and good point #5, could've been a bad timing thing. could your tone have been more serious perhaps?
Waffleiron 0
Dump the ***** posthaste!
Jasper_fml 0
wow. spongebob.. it's addicting.