Today, I told my girlfriend I needed someone to talk to because I just found out my aunt has cancer. She told me to talk to her in an hour, Spongebob was on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was working my shift at the store, my girlfriend appeared and asked to talk to me. Once we were alone, she burst into tears and started sobbing. Turns out someone's dad died in her favorite TV show and she wanted some comfort. FML
Today, my grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer. We're very close, and I called my boyfriend, really needing some support. I'd barely told him what had happened, when he replied, "Babe, I'm in the middle of a game here. Call me later." FML
Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for a romantic dinner, since we can't see each other this Valentine's Day. Halfway through, my aunt called, telling me my grandma had died. I had to leave because I was crying so much, leaving my girlfriend with a very pricey bill. FML
Today, I spilled my guts to my girlfriend, saying I'm scared that all I do is upset her. I then had to sit through a speech about how upset she was that I hadn't told her sooner. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, my wife, who recently had cancer, made an offhand comment that my 30-year-old sister took offense to. Instead of saying something, she went and called our parents. My dad then called and yelled at me for 5 minutes about it. FML
Today, my friend's dad had a heart attack. Without realizing what I was saying, I texted her, "If you need anything, you know I'll be there in a heartbeat." FML
Today, I bitched out my grandmother, who lives with my family, for being lazy and laying in bed until 6-7pm for the past month. When I was done, she told me she had been diagnosed with cancer and was depressed because of it. Nobody had bothered to tell me. FML
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Top comments
briedis 0
I love Spongebob :D But yeah, pretty insesitive girlfriend...
hpnerd 0
Spongebob is an hour long? Some girlfriend..
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Comments (175)
bluewatchmendong 0
How old is your girlfriend??
Yuuhi 0
lol love Spongebob.... and she's a bitch....sorry man..
Bryan_Z 0
can i spell it out? C.U.N.T
Djc1412 0
spongebob wins. perhaps you should've told her the importance of the message
thisisnotmyname 0
Two basic rules of FMyLife.com: 1. Have a shitty SO 2. Have shitty parents
vt_mruhlin 0
Now, did you say, "I need someone to talk to", or did you say, "I need someone to talk to because my aunt has cancer"? If the first case, quit bitching.
theatregrl2 0
the OP shouldn't have had to say "i need someone to talk to because my aunt has cancer." When my dog died I called my best friend and all I said was "hey, um, are you busy?? I really need to talk to someone" and both from the "I really need to talk to someone" and the fact that I sounded upset he dropped what he was doing and talked to me for like an hour. sorry about your aunt's cancer, dude.
jaybirdka 0
chopper says harden the **** up!
ammali 0
LOL, that's what you get for dating an idiot who watches Spongebob. God that cartoon is horrible.
King_of_Kings 3
she is selfish. just like my bitch ex Melody, she only thinks of her. ditch the bitch. you need to find someone who is selfless and caring. someone who will always be there for you no matter what. trust me. i dated a selfish girl who only cared about what she wanted. and it made me miserable. it was all about what Melody wanted. she wanted me to do this & that which required money i didn't have. she didn't care that i was going bankrupt & was strugling to survive. she only cared about what she wanted.