Today, I bought a GPS collar for my adventurous cat. After setting it up and being very curious about what he gets up to when I'm not home, I opened the app and saw his current location marked as “Inside your house.” All day. Groundbreaking. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my cat thought it would be a GREAT idea to sleep in my bag. I only found out when I was driving to work. He isn’t allowed outside. FML
Today, a few weeks after moving in with my boyfriend, I borrowed his phone to Google something because mine was dead. His most recent searches? "How kill cat", "Kill cat laws", "Cat + poison". I thought he was ok with my cat when I moved in. FML
Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML
Today, in my early morning haze, I tried to find the setting on my phone that would stop my cat meowing for his breakfast. FML
Today, I put on a new shirt and headed out to a café to meet a friend. Halfway through our conversation, I noticed my cat had followed me into the café after somehow making a nest in my bag. I looked down to see her tail sticking out of my purse, wagging like she owned the place. She is tiny, but still… how she managed to stay hidden for more than 10 minutes is beyond me. FML
Today, I found out the reason why my cat would sometimes go outside for days at a time was because when she would go out, my neighbor would lure her in with cat treats and keep her there for up to 2 days. She's an indoor cat now. FML
Today, I went searching for my cat who'd escaped. Of course, I searched the entire building and somehow she'd got back in through my front door of my apartment. FML
Today, I discovered a tracking app enabled on my phone so I switched it off to save battery space. Within 20 minutes my mother rang and demanded to know where I was, what I was doing, if I was with some woman… you get the picture. I'm 32 and own my own apartment. FML
Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML
Today, I realized our cat has a sixth sense for when he wants to be seen. When we don't care where the cat is, he's within plain sight. When we lose track of him and are in a panic worrying if he got out, he's hiding. FML
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Top comments
Wadlaen 24
You caught him on his one day off?
rpy13 13
Same 😂. $200 for the device, and $200 per year for the service. He mostly sits behind my neighbour’s shed.
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Comments (3)
Wadlaen 24
You caught him on his one day off?
thinman12345 18
You need to at least wait a week, so you get an average adventure score.
rpy13 13
Same 😂. $200 for the device, and $200 per year for the service. He mostly sits behind my neighbour’s shed.