Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I left for vacation in Mexico. Upon landing, I received a text message from the guy I've been seeing. It read, "Sorry, I'm not boyfriend material. Have a good trip." I paid 75 cents to get dumped, internationally. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I wouldn't be able to get any time off work to go to Mexico with him, and that we'd have to get our tickets refunded, and reschedule. He said not to bother, and that he already had someone else in mind to take with him. FML
Today, a boy I'm not even dating took it upon himself to tell me that we would never work out. Via text message. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by text at 1:30 am because he didn't want to give me "the dread of answering a phone call." When I asked him for an explanation, his reply was, "For what?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years sent me a text message saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend, and he pretended he was a Burger King employee who found a lost phone, just so that he wouldn't have to talk to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend refuses to talk to me because of a misread text. FML
Today, the guy I've been flirting with for a week, and would be meeting in two days, sent me a message that he wouldn't be able to text me this evening because he'll be on a date. FML
Today, I texted the guy I went out with last night. He'd told me he’d text me when he got home, but he never did. Cracking a joke, I asked him if he was homeless or something, since he broke his word. He replied, “No, I’m just not that into you. Have a nice life.” FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend, asking him to meet me when he finished work. Paranoid as he is, he took this to mean that I wanted to break up with him, and is ghosting me into oblivion. All I wanted was to see him on our 4-year anniversary. FML
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Top comments
RoboCunnilingus 23
Either he was joking or that's nacho boyfriend anymore.
JMichael 26
Your boyfriend sounds like a prick.
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Comments (126)
Marie314 17
"Fulfill all your wishes with my taco-flavored kisses! Taco taco"
Musiclover1482 9
Dump his immature ass and find yourself a real man who'll proudly display you. I don't understand why females put up with guys who'll only give them affection in private but out in public act as if they aren't even together. My parents have been together for 30 years and they still hold hands in public. That is what females should concentrate on finding.
xReDMemory 28
That's a couple of idiotic assumptions to make about a guy because he didn't want to go to a goddamn ball.
squideth 18
Stop ******* calling women "females", it's unbelievably degrading.
beaverteaser 16
give that man a taco
Epikouros 32
Before you dump him: does your bf have a brother that likes to play pranks?
jefrey 9
speeddy Gonsalez yeeehhhaaaaaa!! andale andale arriba arriba yeeeehhhaaaaa!!!
Art408 5
That wasn't even clever. That just straight up sucked.
Vahex 19
He's a dick
Blink_me26 21
Now I feel like a burrito.
Ins0mau 20
I feel that FML once had a sense of humour, Judging by the responses here and elsewhere, it appears that's no longer the case. The only comedy here consists of lame comments with disclaimers of irony. P.S OP's boyfriend was joking.
Ins0mau 20
Oh, and silly puns.
flashback_fml 14
Lol stupid and racist