Today, I seriously considered labelling myself as 'in a relationship' on Facebook, even though I haven't been in one since '92, so I can hide just how desperate I am. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I changed my Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship." The girl is made up and the picture is from Google. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, while surfing facebook I noticed someone in my network had recently shifted his relationship status from undeclared to "single." We've been dating exclusively for nine months. FML
Today, someone reckoned that I would never be in a relationship. So I made up this whole story about some made up guy named 'Nick' and posted stuff on my Facebook and Myspace that I'm dating him. Now all my friends want to meet him. FML
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, after deactivating my Facebook page 4 days ago for stalking reasons - as in me stalking my ex - I reactivated it for approximately 3 minutes to see what his status update was, then deactivated it again. I'm just THAT pathetic. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to, "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
Today, as I was creeping on social media, I realized that literally everyone I've ever dated is either happily married, engaged, or in a relationship. My last date was at the beginning of the summer. FML
Today, I felt left out by the fact that all my friends are getting married or have great relationships, and my boyfriend won't commit. I made a Facebook up and pretended to talk with this really cute guy I made up. Today, I found out that my boyfriend is gay when he started hitting on my made-up Facebook guy. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Serene_fml 0
1992? Holy crap, that's almost as long as my age.
meshell_10 0
Whoa time for eharmony!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (110)
hannah1203 2
dayuuuum you haven't been in a relationship since '92??? That's longer than I've been alive
glitchedgamer 0
How would that help anything? Changing your FB status isn't going to make a man appear in front of you and fall in love with you. What if there is someone pursuing you? They'll see your status and then give up. YDI.
tiffyxmac 0
all I can say is daamn! I was born in 92 so that's pretty freakin' sadd..
SadinSherman 16
Wow I was born in 1992
MollyJoe 0
thats REALLY sad. 17 years? hang out with some people, girl!
Thrasher91 0
Hide how desperate you are? Doesn't that just make you more desperate?
sassygrl5 0
Op has got to be exaggerating it... I'm sure you've been on dates just not relationships!
BelleBelle_fml 11
I love your username! And I hope that by now you have found someone that loves you and treats you right. =)
KarWitz 0
o.o go out more .......
Natty23 0
I'm 14 and I only had one gf and saw her one time. and then she dumped me, atleast you got some chicks back in the days