shygurl434
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
taman
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Stinker
Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN!" in front of the whole restaurant. FML
Anonymous
United States
Good job
Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML
HappilyNeverAfter
Port Perry, Canada
My body hates me
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML
ordinaryday
Edmonton, Canada
Today, I reached a new level of commitment in my relationship with my boyfriend. This happened when he pooped on the side of the road beside my truck, while talking and making eye contact with me while wiping. FML
luckygirl
United States
Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, this girl I like just told me a funny story about her pooping adventures. We shared a laugh and she told me "I could never say that to my boyfriend, but I can to you. I don't know, it's like the uglier the boy, the more comfortable I am with him." FML
not impressed
Nanaimo, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
ohwell
United States
Needed to know
Today, I finally confessed to the guy I've liked for two years. I told him that I've really liked him for a long time, and that I knew he had a girlfriend and I didn't expect anything from him, I just wanted him to know. His response? "Are you done? 'Cause I need to go to the bathroom." FML
Anonymous
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Romantic
Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML
Dana
Netherlands 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML
Top comments
Apolloyn 0
thats a good thing
WtFiMdAdDy 0
nice pooper? really. how old is he? hahaha....
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Comments (75)
Apolloyn 0
thats a good thing
UberFail79 0
And? Just ask how big his ding-dong is, and then you'll be even.
wilkshire13 0
say nice clit and be done with it
Tripout 0
Clit??? did u just say clit??? IT A DUDE THAT "COMPLIMENTED" HER. WHY WOULD YOU SAY "Nice clit"???
Dwight_A_R_Manag 0
Guys don't have clits
Tripout 0
complemented* (Dont u hate the anit-flood crap)
WtFiMdAdDy 0
Yea. The guy could of said it more respectful though. Like for example, "Hey you have an amazing body....I would love to see you naked" =D
pooley 0
13 BIG fail us guys don't have clits retard
MF12 0
Compliment is to praise somebody. Complement is when things go well together. ex- "That blue shirt complements your eyes nicely!"
beffburger 0
it was supposed to be a comeback, fools!
applesuckers 0
#13 was making a joke. The guy had said something rude to the OP, so the OP should say something rude back. #13 was saying that the OP should basically call that guy a p*$$y.
imbatman_fml 0
is this the first fml from preschool?
bleedinginside 0
lol
DGross 8
He must have been having a crappy day and it just slipped out...
mrbuddy 0
now you can move on with your life.
ElMetalero 0
I believe they ment clit because they say a dude with a 2 inch penis is not a penis but a large clit lol
TheRipper_fml 0
Applesuckers FTW. It's sad that so many people on this site are so damn SLOW.
ElegantSadist 0
ydi for liking trashy retards
demonsoldier31 0
yes hate it!!!
xundria 5
Actually, 14 and 15 you're both wrong. Guys do technically have "clits." I say this because the muscle that makes up the "clit" in the female is the same exact muscle in males in our penis that absorbs blood to allow us to have an erection. Be a little more edumacated please. :) Have a nice day!
Dwight_A_R_Manag 0
Don't be a fag xundra
xundria 5
Yeah, I'm a fag because I have a little intelligence. You're cool Mr. "internet bully."
ReyEr9412 0
I would love to see a Hallmark card that says "nice pooper"
paigeatsflesh 11
you should take that as a compliment!
ALEX920 0
wow retard
Tuptup_fml 0
Holy crap, they don't?!
Glarznak 0
xundria, you kick ass. Bio that Bitch!
xundria 5
lol 84, thanks =p
SealClubber 0
technically guys do have a clit. male and female bodies are the same early on in the womb, and later form. clit turns into a penis for males, and ovaries descend and become testicles as the bodies change. hence why the ******** gets harder when aroused. it's like a mini wiener with an erection essentially.
hotscar 3
14, it could have been making fun of him or being an ass because he was rude
xundria 5
Thank you 89 for stating what I already said. :)
Dwight_A_R_Manag 0
It's not a ******** bc it turns into a ****
ChocolateTazer 0
YDI for having a nice pooper.
Blur009er 0
that's the point of the come bak
woofis 0
today the guy I like complemented me. fml I don't think so op
bubbarific 0
UFO for havin a nice pooper
XCaLX_fml 0
19..yes 20..whats ur pic of
XCaLX_fml 0
59...little?
wickeddrummajor 0
@22, the way i took it, It's meant to be an insult, saying he has a tiny penis.
z620 0
evryone hating on #13 they aren't retarded it's a joke so shut up
xundria 5
Lol 104, what're you trying to say?
xundria 5
@94: You don't seem to be so intelligent. Do a little research on the human anatomy before trying to seem like you are. The "********" is made up of the same muscle that in males absorbs the blood causing what you and I and everyone else knows as an "erection." Humans are born in both the same body, just like 84 said, females ovaries are our balls.
toxic10uhc 0
13 is suggesting the guy is a woman.
oneforme 0
you should have pulled down your panties and pooped a cute lil turd out and handed it to him and said thank you! tastes as good as it looks!!
fsxman1 11
I don't get how this is a FML oh **** your life a guy complamented you this isn't a FML
RKftw 0
at 22 I love how you have to proclaim your manhood. it was a joke. odviously guys don't have clits, so she would be implying he was a girl. ********
Fatalally 4
#13 Isn't suggesting the other person is a girl -.- I'm not even going to explain it because countless people have already.
lockywhite 0
hahaha that dude has the mad lines. fyl indeed
imchanel 0
exactly
ButterflyBaby 0
way to pick 'em, OP.
turtles1321 0
boys now have clings....., I'm scared for myself
MiGman 5
#22 that's exactly the point because it's calling the guy a girl
omg_thats_funny 0
13- niceeee :D 22- that's the POINT dumbass!
nihblah 0
you spelt it right the first time
torontobuds 0
38 you just ruined my life with that joke
K_Roxxie 0
ur smart :)
xexu13 3
nice **** babe
TheManliestMan 0
Lmao literally
dochoc_fml 0
take the complement
Tht_one_crazyj 0
nice pooper yeah thts one hot compliment .. I should start saying it maybe i'll get some ass
ohSNAPyall 27
Maybe you'll get some pooper?
ahhhmber 0
because that's not creepy at all...
Dwight_A_R_Manag 0
how's it creepy? it's not like he said I want you to put your pooper on my face..
Mordecai89 0
women are so up tight... just smile, blush, and walk away... he knows that he just gave you something to later talk about with your friends, (and then we become the "topic of conversation")
WtFiMdAdDy 0
nice pooper? really. how old is he? hahaha....
OliviaMarieAnn 0
it's cute (: not an fml!
Tripout 0
cute?..... YYYYEEEEAAAAAA SSSUUURREE
amayasoma 19
Um...ok...O.o
ahhhmber 0
aha well I guess I find it creepy because there is a kid who says the on my face part to me. it's just awkward.
maskedman 9
ahhhmber you are so funny. Is it awkward before or after you let him pooper on your face.
aeliz 0
That's kinda weird, but a compliment none-the-less, I suppose. How old is this 'boy'? He sounds five.
ahhhmber 0
exactly.
SubjectDelta 0
So this cute girl walks by right? Her dog is just adorable so I told her she had a nice pooper, she blushes and runs off right? Weird I didn't know girls were so sensitive about their dogs... Oh yeah she also had a nice anal cavity, I wanted to put it on my face.
alin123 0
nice pooper WTF I think he's reffering to ur asshole not ur ass idk...start likeing someone else he's obviously a fagg