Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, I was cooking dinner when I noticed a cockroach on the kitchen counter. I reflexively tried to spray it with what I had to hand, which was window cleaner, but it seems to have pissed it off and flew right at me instead. I screamed and ran out of the kitchen, leaving the roach in charge. FML
Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Today, I was studying for a big test I have next Tuesday in my room. I heard a creak in my ceiling but assumed it was nothing as my house is old. Thirty seconds later something fell from my air vent directly onto my head. It was a giant cockroach. FML
Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML
Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML
Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML
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Top comments
NATFLUMP 0
OMFG MAN WHY WOULD YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH OPEN ! dude, you fcking stuuuuuuupid.
prettybadfuckup 0
GROSSNESS
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Comments (132)
prettybadfuckup 0
GROSSNESS
Zombierella 2
"When I hit it" ....hmm, you had sex with a cockroach? |: YDI
Zhejan 0
Look at the bright side, now you can say you've put at least one type of "****" in your mouth
Reyo 2
That's what you get for trying to kill something that was only trying to make its own way in life.
_cheeseballs 0
SHUT THE **** UP WITH THIS 'KARMA MUCH' ¬_¬
Slaught_fml 3
I'm calling FAKE because of the "karma much" bullshit that all the fakish FMLs have been having lately.
bugmenotmofo 34
was it a big ****-roach?
Star18lk 0
They can say Karma much? if they want so stop telling people what to do.
Ohnothingreally 0
I agree with you star. **** you trolls.
_cheeseballs 0
I'm not a troll, I've just seen it on this website enough to make me annoyed. :)
hbgoddard 0
I agree with you. People just don't seem to ******* understand that there's NO SUCH THING AS KARMA!!
fmlfmlfml15 0
#64 It's only been on the website twice!! I think you are easily annoyed.
dudeitsdanny 10
Agreed with #72. The word karma has only been used in 6 FML posts.
DSappy 0
Wow, you're actually counting. Impressive... x
azi_16 0
This is not Karma. This is The Powers That Be punishing you for your blatent stupidity. You can't seriously try to swat at something directly above you, with your mouth hanging wide open, and be surprised when it ends up in your mouth.
dudeitsdanny 10
81- Type karma into the search box. Not a toughie. lol.
signuploginpassw 0
something like this happened in the new adventures of old Christine. but her foot was stuck in a toilet
seanj 0
why were u standing directly under it while trying to knock it down YDI
Uncle_Moe_Lester 3
I don't think karma applies to killing bugs
PinkieKeen 20
I think I threw up a little in my mouth.
NATFLUMP 0
OMFG MAN WHY WOULD YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH OPEN ! dude, you fcking stuuuuuuupid.
Hazy_fml 0
My word.. Are you really that stupid?
tyhillman 0
It's not gross. Chocolate covered cockroaches are the best lol jk.
Bloodknight 22
Your an idiot...
drano 0
Hmmmm......
jkjackson1990 0
ummmmm close your mouth. YDI
XOfiestypixie 0
I think this is the second time I've seen the phrase "karma much?" But still, sucks for you. But at least they're full of protein. =)
Gavik 0
Stop saying "Karma much?" in the FMLs. It doesn't even apply here.
diet_otaku 0
MTE. this FML would have been perfectly fine without "karma much?", especially since it's not bad karma to kill a cockroach.
bexwiggy 0
Yes it is-it's bad karma to kill any sentient being.
Witchcraft_fml 5
The reasoning that Karma doesn't apply here is based on the sole fact that the OP kept his mouth hanging wide open when swatting at something directly above him. Blame stupidity, not Karma.
Person1233 13
Too many FMLs saying 'karma much' at the end.
fmlfmlfml15 0
Aside from this FML, there is only one other FML that says "Karma, much?" But I'm guessing that two is too many.
Person1233 13
I probably should have said with something about Karma at the end.
skullbashd 3
yeah there's only six all together
dnlphm94 0
It's not "karma." It's "self-inflicted." Who leaves their mouth gaping open while killing a bug on the ceiling?
lem0n_fml 0
Actually, karma IS self-inflicted. Although this FML has nothing to do with karma, your comments kinda didn't make sense. :
DaRito 25
You're implying that karma exists?