Today, I realized that the most romantic thing that my boyfriend and I have done in the last month is comb lice out of each other's hair. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I are so close that we share everything. This now includes his head lice. Thanks, dude. FML
Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML
Today, my boyfriend refused to have his hair treated against lice, because "men don't have lice". FML
Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML
Today, I’ve been growing dreads for two years after I lost my hair to chemo. After visiting my boyfriend’s family, we all contracted lice from the kids. Even though I did the shampoo and treatment, my locks are too coiled to effectively comb out all the nits. I have to shave my head again. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
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Top comments
justdancebbyx3 7
Thats ******* disgusting.
avfcfan89 0
hey, thats not too bad. Look on the brightside, you cannot get pregnant from doing that. Plus, all monkeys everywhere would love reading this.
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Comments (138)
ozymandias_fml 0
YDI for being a disgusting slob of a person. Lice? Really? *pukes*
fuckingshitt343 0
uhm, lice actually goes to clean hair. not dirty. so maybe if they were a disgusting slob or didn't shampoo they wouldn't have lice. hmm. so let's drop that one. but regardless, it takes two people to have a romantic night. so why don't you just tell him that you want to do something nice? thats what i do. sometimes you gotta wear the pants in the relationship. as my boyfriend says "i can't read your mind!" haha.
ozymandias_fml 0
I'm sorry, but *clean* people don't have lice. Period. Having lice means you are a disgusting slob for getting them in the first place.
averagexbecca 0
#94 How the hell do you work that one out? I don't know what you learned growing up, but lice don't magically appear in 'disgusting slobs'' heads. They get there from other people who have lice, and if they work around children it's easy to get them. It doesn't make you disgusting for having them - but if they weren't combing them and getting rid of them, then, and only then would they be disgusting. And lice do prefer clean hair, it's quite easy to catch them...so there goes your 'clean people don't get lice theory'...hrm. OP - Mm...romantic...is this foreplay for some wild monkey sex or something? But I have to say, if you feel like there's no romance, then do something about it.
fuckingshitt343 0
oh my god thank you #99. #94, and all the other people saying that OP and her boyfriend are dirty are just morons. you learn in like the 3rd grade about lice. when i was in elementary school we had lice checks like all the time. and once you are old enough you like remember things like learning that lice prefers cleanliness over dirtiness. why don't you guys google it or something.
ozymandias_fml 0
Ok, it's a simple concept: while lice might like hair that is clean more than they like hair that is dirty -- *having lice* makes otherwise clean hair disgusting and dirty. Period. I might have clean shoes -- other than the inch think cake of dog crap on the bottoms -- but it's that inch think cake of dog crap that makes them dirty.
Oishi_fml 0
Awwww...
bird33 0
You might be a redneck if.....
TheECP 1
Then go do something romantic. If just being together isn't enough for you two, you probably don't work out for each other anyways.
SarahsWickedGame 0
Thats really ******* disgusting
im_mad_cute 0
ha sounds like a good time to me!
cefarix 5
Actually, grooming each other is an excellent way of developing strong and intimate social bonds. Primates do this as well.
sincerelyautumn 0
Have you ever thought of living in the jungle with the monkeys?
greent_fml 0
oh damn this is too hot. pics plz??