Today, I realized that I'm so bored of my relationship with my girlfriend, I'd rather make sure I don't break the springs in my bed than make love to her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Instead of having breakup sex, she tidied my room. She said it gave her more pleasure than any time we'd ever had sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't initiate sex much anymore. The only way she will have sex is at night, lights out, covers on, TV turned up, and no foreplay or anything. It's so fucking boring, I'd rather just watch TV. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
Today, I came to the realization that I dream more about my vibrator than I do about my boyfriend. FML
Today, I realized that masturbating to pictures of my girlfriend is better than having sex with her. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML
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Top comments
ALEX920 0
your a dick
Bruingirl103 0
if you're seriously that bored than just break up, don't drag it out any longer
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Comments (139)
ALEX920 0
your a dick
rarelyspoken 0
I'll make love to her.
JCadle90 0
she'll probably eat his dick
thor89 0
You can just mess her up say "I love you" and go walking to the beach at night (make it be really far from her house)Then say you're the love of life have really passionate sex with her then in the beach you propose to her and say SIKe slap her in the face with penutbutter or honey (peanutbutter slap) then run to the car leave her show finger and scream **** YOU my BED almost broke and say I SLEPT with you're mom that would teach her :).
tweetbaby14 18
17 lmao that's amazing but OP you should leave her and when she asks why just say it's for the good of my mattress
colomexparra 0
at 1... yeah hes a dick. dont worry she's so bored with you that she is getting her brains ****** as we speak. dont worry shes breaking someone elses mattress right now and will be breaking up with you later aaahhhhaaahhhaa
WeahNicole 0
He's not a dick for feeling how he feels. Although he does need to tell her instead of being fake.. P.S. Why do OP's never reply to comments? I've never seen it, lol.
Fightet4ever 0
WTF ?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KMC_x3 0
this is more of a FML for the girlfriend. it would be funnier if the OP's girlfriend posted this.
Boots1017 0
do her a favor and break up with her!!
Nena713 0
#31 I've seen it twice, lol! but I wish they would more often. Anyway, OP I hope she finds someone better than you
jeremy418 0
lol wow
Blue_Coconuts 7
Hey fat girls need lovin too.... But they gotta pay.
way_to_go 0
thats dumb.... why would he wanna do that? he's bored... he doesn't hate her
dumbbitchhater2 0
dump that bitch
dealwithlife 0
woa. you mis-spelled your. It should be you're.
mai109 8
agreed
davemania 0
@weahnicole... yeah y?
marleytooyou 0
uhhh..... akward!!
WeahNicole 0
@Davemania - I just think it would be cooler if they replied more often instead of it just being a bunch of strangers talking about the poster. Plus everyone says something directed at the OP even though they rarely reply or even read it lol. :P
Hoozen 0
you are a goddess
Ms_Jessie22 8
Today, I realized the reason my boyfriend and I don't have sex anymore is because he loves his mattress more than me. FML
paigeatsflesh 11
aw. this is sadd. ):
jefecito_fml 0
I'll bet you and your girlfriend are fatasses
kevinwestonjonah 0
then y don't u break up with her you douche
taylorxsayss 0
@1 agreed
SeasonedSausage 0
You sir are very smart. mattresses nowadays are quite expensive to replace. girls aren't that expensive to replace.
Gabbiegummies 4
@17 lmfao I would love to see that happen an th gf would prob fml that happening to her
tease 0
hehe... what an asshole are u!! gotta love the tough love ;)
tease 0
yeah... it's called: eat less and work out more :)
alex112094 5
lol
MizzLaughter 1
yes yuh are a dick
ashlynn610 12
@86, you're a dick... I bet you are just mad because you can't get any...
TempestJones 0
Agree with those saying the OP is a dick. If you don't know why, it's because the OP would rather post on FML an insultto his gf who probably has no idea he feels this way. OP if your so fuxking bored, then figure out shit to do (or new positions if it's about sex) to do with her. For those saying she's a fat ass, where does it say that!? He could be the fat one or neither could e overweight. Why is everyone nowadays so obsessed with weight?
bubbarific 0
ydi for havin a spring mattress
Peacemaker9 7
dude that's ******* ****** up WTF is wrong with u!!!!!!!'
capt_awesome1 11
what the hell ? who doesn't like sex ?!
robotiick 12
ur a dick a box
Irishopoly19 9
That's what he's a dick for, not breaking up with her.
Annihilator257 15
You're
THEDUDE1553566 24
I've seen it a lot. Some really do reply. When they do their comments are blue
Bruingirl103 0
if you're seriously that bored than just break up, don't drag it out any longer
sicpupyz122 0
lol
babybubz 0
...seriously. grow some balls and break up with her before you end up cheating.
xoconnie 8
i agree. if ur SOOO bored, break up. its that simple. (:
TempestJones 0
Lust_Roar... You just became my hero! :)
poooook 0
wowww . fyl? no.
KurouTenshi 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
sounds like your girlfriends fat, OP. yknow what they say about bigger women: more cushion for the pushin'. Now, the great thing about a big girl is this: when you're done ******* her, if you break your springs, she's so big, she'll double as a mattress!!
AnSTD 0
It's the fat chicks that do more stuff ;).
XxKeLs3yxX 0
that's defintely not true
xoconnie 8
^^^ YOU would know.ROFL
YeahFMLxX 0
that's kind of hot..
Bruingirl103 0
wut is wrong with u!!! that's the most insensitive thing iv ever heard!
KurouTenshi 0
I'm a pretty insensitive asshole. it comes from being picked on all throughout school. and hanging out with assholes doesn't help either. (and I'm gay, so I'm friendly with assholes!)
jessv123 0
#47 lmao
Monikabug 9
You are full of win today Chris. :)
brunettegurly 0
I read your profile. I LOVE ZELDA
You_Just_Failed 0
you should leave her on the floor so she does not ruin your bed
karina_said 0
;) hahaha
Stumblebum30 5
She could be just as bored with you. Maybe you're such a lousy lover she doesn't see the need to put any effort into making things more exciting. I'm just saying....
Emmmmm55 0
ok??? nd how is ur life f' up
okieraider71 4
OMG--How fat are you two? I have never worried about that!
jlheinjus 0
have sex on the floor, that way your bed is safe and you have time to rekindle your love for her, if you don't love her then ditch her and pick up a hotty from a bar
erjaguam 0
leave her so she can find someone better than you op.
chelstootall 0
yeah wow I don't know of anyone that could break the springs on a bed lol at least never hurd of that...