Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today I discovered that I'm so pale that I can lighten up any distant dark corner of the room just by placing my hand by a window and reflecting the light like a mirror. Imagine how bright it would be if I stood by the window naked. FML
Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML
Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML
Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML
Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML
Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML
Today, I have bad adult acne. This wouldn't be so bad, except that it's only on one side of my face. I look like a Batman villain. FML
Today, I managed to multitask too much at work. I turned around, adjusted my glasses, swept hair out of my face, and blinked. In the process, I walked into my manager, causing me to simultaneously punch myself in the mouth. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, when I woke up, one half of my face was smooth and clear and the other half looked as if I got slapped by the Hand of Puberty itself. FML
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Top comments
honeybunches88 5
Maybe you should turn your desk around and get the other side tanned up too :)
portablecupid 3
Or close the damn window? Maybe get some blinds? You can't get a tan through glass because it filters out UV light, so either the dumbass is leaving the window open or he's lying.
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Comments (47)
iburppeopleup 0
yeah... blinds, shades, and curtains work... or just put on sunscreen dumbass
Baxton_fml 2
that's cool!
Stevefett 0
My stupid comments only show up randomly. I hate that!!
marie1239 0
Lmfao, that's too funny! your two faced!
syki 22
It's just not your month, Janus.
xXBlAcKxWiDoWXx 0
The Greek god with two faces, right? The god of choices? Percy Jackson FTW!
honeybunches88 5
Yes because sun does not really shine through glass; it's just an illusion.
ziphii 6
We need a "so what?" option. This is not a fml, this is just no big freaking deal.
syki 22
Actually, radcrow is mostly right. Skin darkening is caused by UV light, not visible, and most glass is formulated to filter it, as it's linked to cancer. If this is true, the window was open, or the glass is just shitty. =/
tessalovesyou17 0
wait that's a joke right? you can't just move a window..
Sirin_fml 47
Just one question: who said the window was closed?