Today, my boss said he's worried about our network, because, "Wi-Fi’s all in the air. People could spy on us from anywhere!" I sarcastically said, "My god, you're right!" and suggested switching to tin-foil Ethernet cables to stop the signal escaping. He told me to do it ASAP. This moron makes five times my salary. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my boss that using a wired connection instead of wifi won't stop his computer from getting viruses. He looked at me, open-mouthed and wide-eyed, like he was a 13-year-old boy and I was a pair of tits. Then he called me clueless and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, my boss - whose intelligence level hovers a hair above "Herpity derpity derp" - got up my ass and accused me of lying to him. All because I said that just because I'm a network admin, I can't make his 7 year old piece of crap Blackberry magically be able to use 4G networks. FML
Today, my computer stopped connecting to the corporate network. I know what the problem is, but our tech support is so clueless that the only thing they do is utter the dreaded words, "Did you try turning it off and back on?" Meanwhile my boss is yelling at me for not getting any work done. FML
Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML
Today, it’s my second week at work. I received a phone call from corporate HQ that they wanted to make our monitors wireless, so they wanted me to cut the red wire from the main monitors. I did so, and my boss walks in, furious. Turns out it was a set up to see if I’m “that gullible.” Yes, I was fired. FML
Today, I was in a video call with my boss when my Wi-Fi decided to take a vacation. I thought I could salvage the situation by using my iPhone’s hotspot. But then my phone ran out of data mid-sentence, and my boss got a glimpse of me cursing at my phone while frantically waving it in the air. FML
Today, our boss replaced all our computers with new Apple iMacs, which have fewer USB ports and none of our software or saved files. He insists it’s all “in the Cloud thing somewhere, figure it out and show some damn gratitude.” We are now incapable of doing our jobs but he insists he’s blameless. FML
Today, my neighbor finally password-protected his wifi. Right in the middle of my timed, online exam. FML
Today, our computer system has irretrievably broken down due to viruses. My boss is the one who refused to get new antivirus software, but he’s still blaming me because I’m the computer guy and should be able to protect us from stupidly complicated viruses, "like the hackers in the movies." FML
Today, I was doing a job interview on Skype when my roommate decided to reboot the wireless router because "the internet was too slow". The interviewer didn't bother calling again. FML
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Top comments
Joshery 14
Maybe you should ask for a raise, he might be stupid enough to give it to you
coldwar252 13
Did you do it?
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Comments (47)
Joshery 14
Maybe you should ask for a raise, he might be stupid enough to give it to you
Rinat_fml 26
OP should use his boss's stupidity for his own good. Survival of the fittest.
Retaheki 27
OP's boss is both seriously gullible and seriously paranoid.
malea_17 16
Social Darwinism
purpleturtle16 20
Move everyone to Ethernet, lock your device MACs to the WiFi, enjoy high speed connectivity without anyone else hogging your bandwidth and ask for a raise because you "protected" the entire office! Win-Win!
coldwar252 13
Did you do it?
AriettaX 15
i guess you taught him a very valuable lesson: wireless internet can have wires! ouuu spooky this isnt even funny why am i still posting
cjmedic 12
#2 Ah-ah! Not guilty!
curlytop101 23
And if that doesn't work, maybe have him ask Santa for a new magic wired internet connection!
MrConcise 35
Wait, this is sarcasm, right?... That can only mean...Wired internet isn't real?!
PSYqualiac 17
#10, The wired internet is just the cake reincarnated. We all know the cake is a lie.
devildog562 33
Don't confuse the electronically challenged people, it makes like more difficult for anyone that has to help them in the future...
devildog562 33
Life *** more difficult for future people .... Not one nazi corrected me . Amazing
nevm 12
You should tell him you need a brand new computer to do the job
Paulvuck 15
How old is your boss/supervisor?
shay_serendipity 29
I don't see how age is a factor here. The boss is old enough to be employed, and whatever age that may be doesn't affect his stupidity. He's just stupid, no matter what age.
T_Young96 13
Not necessarily. Most older aged people aren't as tech savvy as the younger generation. That doesn't make him stupid just unaware of today's technology and depending on this guy's job he may not be required to know today's latest technology. So really.. Who's the stupid on here..
shay_serendipity 29
#20, that makes sense. I thumbed myself down, because now that I think about it, if his boss were older it would make sense. I had some different kind of logic that doesn't really make sense now... l Sorry.
RufusBarbarossa 13
21- You restored some of my faith in humanity. It is not often someone admits their own mistakes on this app. Kudos to you!
cherry_popper69 11
Dr Phil here : glad to see you worked things out #20 your going on to better things
T_Young96 13
I like you #21. Your a cool dude! Let it be known in this day!! FML has finally completed a knowledgable and decent debate without use of profanity, name calling, or sarcasm.. Here's to you FML!!! Progress March on!!!
Hiimhaileypotter 53
#62 It's actually happened quite a few times, it's always nice to read :)
Ilikepie82479 20
Be careful who you use sarcasm on
tony1891 22
next step. wearing tin foil hats so the aliens can't read your thoughts.
Murilirum 23
The struggle is real. I know the pain of dealing with tech-insufficient people.
cmchappy 25
If he worked for a tech company he would be drowning in irony