Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML
Today, after my mom picked me up from the mall, she asked me what was in my bag from Gap. I wouldn't tell her, and she ended up grounding me. It was her Mother's Day present. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML
Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Today, I was a little grumpy. I tried my best to not take it out on other people, but then I encountered that ONE person who doesn't realize that sometimes people are just in a bad mood, and they proceed to give you a hard time over nothing. That person was my mom. And then later my dad. Now I'm grounded. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend, since we weren't getting along. When I got home, I remembered that today is his birthday. Him and all our friends now think I'm a total bitch. FML
Today, I've been so stressed out that I forgot my own birthday. I only remembered when my mom talked to me to let me know she wasn't planning on doing anything for it. FML
Today, rather than get me a birthday present, my boyfriend just got angry that I got gifts from other people. Apparently, it "made him feel guilty." FML
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Top comments
gabfoundnemo 5
Admitting it is the first step. To rehab you go.
Vball6 19
Bitch.
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Comments (311)
Arile 5
BITCH!!!
LittleDevil01 4
You utter biatch..
aylard 0
Cow bitch. c: utter.. Get it xD
iliketurdles 7
Oh, you used a momma joke? Tell me more about how you're a mature adult.
mollysticks 10
106- that would be funnier if you had the Willy Wonka meme in your display picture
SobrietyKills 14
89) where is your nose in your picture?
TheDrifter 24
What ever happened to Valium? It did such a wonderful job controlling this kind of parenting issue.
irokyoursox 6
What the hell kind of logic is that
reallytho3 11
You don't need logic when you're a bitch apparently
brackaman 18
Big birds face with the comment just made it even better.
thunter2000 2
Your child is screwed!
TarieBoo 2
He's a son of a bitch
missalkali 8
fourth time I've seen that joke in a comment, and counting
ohSNAPyall 27
At least he stood up for himself.
onealmxwilson 18
You bitch! Oh wait... That's already been established.
dellis44 7
damn. I wouldn't be surprised if he took.the gift back.
bmkc4 1
I would. She is ungrateful and doesn't deserve a gift.
xFluttershy 7
112 - !? You just agreed with him but worded it in a different way. HAHA
bmkc4 1
I meant I would take the gift back too
shaybie 1
if i was ur kid what ever i got u i would use it for myself or trash it u deserve Nothing
tinysocks 11
Only you can change it...
smydiwannafthata 5
Now I know who my lid was referring to when he was talking about misses bitch.