Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, one week after moving into my new apartment in a new city to get away from my stalker ex, I met my new neighbour. Yep, stalker ex. FML
Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML
Today, my fiancé and I just moved into our first apartment together. Our neighbor across the hall? My ex-boyfriend who I've had to file three separate restraining orders on. FML
Today, I signed a two-year lease on a house. My next-door neighbor said she's in love with me, threatened my girlfriend, and won't stop blasting Taylor Swift. FML
Today, I'm hiding from my creepy next-door neighbor. She constantly trash-talks my partner of two years, she's mentally unstable, looks to me for support, has a raging crush on me, and she drunkenly tried to make out with me last weekend. I'm two months older than her daughter. FML
Today, I'm hiding in my own house, because my crazy neighbor wants to "play." Yesterday when I agreed, she made me spend the whole day with her, then burst into tears when I had to leave. She's been waiting outside for over two hours. FML
Today, my new neighbour is delusional. She’s only lived next door 3 weeks and she’s called the police on me 11 times for “taking his bin out so he can look in my window”, “hanging out the washing so he can look in my window” and “barbecuing with his kids so he can look in my window.” Crazy bitch. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, my landlord started showing my apartment, where I have lived and paid rent for over 2 years, to prospective tenants. I didn't realize that I was moving. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. I was feeling really excited until my new neighbor knocked on my door and left me what looks like rabbit ears on my welcome mat. He just stared at me expectantly as though I should be thankful. FML
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Top comments
cuntfacekillah 5
well it's not your fault. I'm sure that woman is just extremely insecure.
green_eggs_and_h 0
You should pretend to be super paranoid too and watch her all the time.
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Comments (159)
krysxkatastrophe 14
Marraige counseling anyone?
seeunexttuesdays 6
get a boyfriend, then she won't have to worry about you tryna get with her husband....lol
scoobyfiend 0
wait till she trusts you and let's her guard down.... then steal him
Allyb321 0
good luck!
dreamering 16
Tell her that stealing and borrowing are two different things. Than, run way fast.
syed121417 22
Then*
knight0748 5
my best friend has a crazy lady for a neighbor in his next apt who constantly calls the cops on him for no reason other his new born baby crying. so we annoy the shit out of her till she started avoiding his family. sometimes, the best defense is an offense.
Bowser6622 5
She needs help.
BigPerro4life 0
tell her to back off... or you will F*** her husband.
shibbysgirl 4
I'm thinking he's cheated before!
megthegreat 2
if you make any comments/threats/jokes about stealing her husband it would probably just make her more paranoid because it would let her know that you stealing her husband isn't out of the question.