Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. I was playing with his little sister by grabbing her arms and spinning her around. On one turn, she started screaming in pain. It turns out I dislocated both her shoulders. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I met my daughter's first serious boyfriend, only she forgot to mention he has hypermobility. All I did was shaking his hand normally, but it still dislocated three of his knuckles. My daughter made me call his mother to explain what I did. FML
Today, I finally got to see my boyfriend, after two months apart. As we hugged, he lifted me up and spun me around like in the movies. It would have been really romantic if I hadn't hit a little boy while he was riding past on his bike. I've just traumatized a little kid. FML
Bullshit quack chiropractor on the loose!
Today, I told my family how my wrist has been hurting for almost a week. My aunt’s chiropractor boyfriend then decided he could help by suddenly pulling my hand as hard as he could. Not only did my wrist pop and cause me more pain, but my shoulder got dislocated. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML
Big wuss
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Gravel?
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Time to leave
Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. When I went to shake her dad's hand, I broke his watch. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
Top comments
prttyyngthng 0
That's one HELL of a first impression.
mogan_fml 0
the shoulders are supposed to stay IN the sockets? oh, oh dear.
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Comments (163)
ayoooooo 0
that sucks so much. congrats on your fail..
thisisher 0
That's why you support them under their armpits when you do that shit. A child's shoulder can't support their entire weight. Lifting them by their arm is just asking for them to be hurt . Granted, it is pretty easy to dislocate their shoulders, but still. You have to be more careful than that with kids. YDI.
shananigans 0
My uncle did that to his little sister (my aunt) when they were kids. Apparently it's not uncommon... Were her parents watching? If they were then it's not entirely your fault; if they had thought something like that would happen they would have told you to stop. If they were elsewhere, well...FYL AND Fherlife.
MGMT_fml 0
FAIL FAIL FAIL
Lolrus 0
omg haha, i was like laughing and being horribly shocked at the same time. Try lifting weights instead of children.
bayybee 0
my little brother dislocated our youngest brothers arms one time. My younger brother was 9 at the time and our youngest brother was 2 or 3. when we took him to the hospital a nurse looked at him and was like oh this happens all the time and just popped it back in. dont be so hard on yourself.
seamripper 0
I keep hearing about people doing this, so I don't get how people don't realize that throwing kids around by the arms is not safe. Come on, now.
poison29 0
**** children.
kewlfox 0
@10.. u throw puppies in the air??
_milf__fml 0
...You normally don't hold children by the hands/arms as you swing them around. Have them face the same direction you are, and thing your hands around their chest. It's not as fun as the other way, but it's safer and it's the same concept. Hope that helps if they ever let you play with her again.