Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a cute girl's number for the first time. Too bad it was because she rear ended my car. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML
Today, I tried to keep a drunk girl from driving by holding her keys, but she had a spare set in her purse. She hit me with her car when I was walking home. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Today, I went for a drive to clear my head of relationship issues. That night, I got pulled over. Lost the car and my license. I texted my girlfriend, saying I was sorry; she left. Lost her too. FML
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
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Top comments
freernnur5 0
you fail for trying to drink and drive
Silent_Harmony 3
Ok so not only do you drink and then drive. But then you start texting too?
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Comments (204)
mccaincracker 6
None for you tonight :P
withmywideeyes 0
11- that was ironic right?
T_r_i_c_k_Y 0
#13-That was sarcasm, right?
tingting1 0
yeah, i think you were looking for the word 'sarcasm'... not ironic. :S
YDIBITCHES 0
That's what you get for trying to be a smart ass
lol69_fml 0
so did you also rear end her in the bed?
22jrdn55 15
i doubt it!
the_stereotype 0
people like you are the reason they make laws. the rest use this thing called common sense.
Vaetrus 0
Weirdly enough... it ain't so common.
keith444 0
we call this a fail from where i come from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KF0_7qC6YFo ahha watch this
22jrdn55 15
hahaha its funny how everyone dies but the girl texting!
Jazzywrites007 2
Good ******* God I'm throwing away my cell phone now >.
keith444 0
lol
canucksrule88 0
lol wow how do you not even realize you drift into the other lane....
CFR 0
Oh no the baby! D'= Gets to the point though...I hate texting so much, it's so stupid.
Pointy130 0
if driving while talking on the phone is unsafe, what makes you think that driving while texting is going to be safer?YDI for being a dumbass.
RJB 0
"Dont worry tonight I wont be missing your exit ;-)"
tingting1 0
hahahaha that's too funny!
Chaith 16
Lolol.
the_stereotype 0
creative :D
visage 0
Sooooo, how did that work out for you? I've tried a million different ways to get laid, and even succeeded a time or two, but never tried wrecking her car.
AntiChrist7 0
is that your idea of foreplay?