Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a cute girl's number for the first time. Too bad it was because she rear ended my car. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML
Today, I tried to keep a drunk girl from driving by holding her keys, but she had a spare set in her purse. She hit me with her car when I was walking home. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Today, I went for a drive to clear my head of relationship issues. That night, I got pulled over. Lost the car and my license. I texted my girlfriend, saying I was sorry; she left. Lost her too. FML
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
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Top comments
freernnur5 0
you fail for trying to drink and drive
Silent_Harmony 3
Ok so not only do you drink and then drive. But then you start texting too?
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Comments (204)
FoundManyLemons 0
Texting while driving after drinking? You're a complete idiot.
viper144 0
23342 people know that drinking and driving, texting and drving or a combination of both is the stupidest thing you can do. Don't do it again.
beertime36 0
too bad you didn't rear ended her the way you wanted to.
Hazard911 0
You're a dumbass for texting while driving. Too bad she got hit, but you completely deserve it.
twilight_addict 0
u r a f**king dumb ass for text and driving...go on you-tube and type in texting and driving psa u sud watch it it's 4minutes long and it will never make u text and drive at the same time
jts2 3
Holy crap, this is like.. the ultimate combination of discouraged acts. 1) Drinking and Driving = Frowned upon 2) Texting and Driving = Frowned upon Soo.. Driving while drunken and texting. Sounds fun.
ObadiahtheSlim 2
Drinking and Driving is dangerous. Drinking and Texting is even more dangerous. Doing both is about the most dangerous thing you can do.
kukopia 0
She was obviously trying to lose him!! Who misses their own exit?!? She texted that to him so he'd go some different way and she could get away. But now he knows where she lives... 'cause her address is on the accident report.
Stephie_fml 0
Well, that's what you were going for in the first place, amirite? ;)
live2dance94 0
DON"T DRIVE AND TEXT. end of story. you or someone else could get killed people are killed in accidents everyday because someone is texting, instead of driving. just DON"T DO IT.