mary
Australia
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
tylerlove361
United States
Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML
Heyme
France
Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML
heeeeeyitsbrittney
Butterfingers
Today, I cut myself with a butter knife while trying to get a piece of brownie from a pan. I don't think I was meant to survive on Earth for very long. FML
Chicketi
Canada
Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML
Anonymous
Put it away
Today, I managed to cut myself twice with a Swiss army knife. Stabbed in one hand and sliced a finger on the other. Good to know it's super sharp. FML
Jaws
France
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
oops
My chocolate
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
TaintedL0v3
London, United Kingdom
Heavy session last night?
Today, I woke up with Chocolate Buttons superglued to my face. FML
irony
United States
Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML
kp.
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
Australia
Gotta have it
Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML
Top comments
FiasCudi 0
how did you manage that?
CrimsonViolets 11
"chocolate rain"... ow ****!
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Comments (323)
Skyrim123 3
It must be a sign
emit97 8
I would have eaten it before I could have cut myself.
Akharr01 5
Oh.....
KatnissHawthorne 2
I did this too! I am not alone :) unless this is one of my friends who posted to make fun of me... Anyway, how I did it was by leaving hot chocolate in the microwave too long. It then solidified into an awesome mess. It was delicious, but hard as a rock. I cut myself when I was trying to scrape the last bits that had gotten stuck on the bottom of the cup off. Apparently, they were sharp...
brookie_0841 1
Well that's not bullshit or anything..
sarahrocrocrocks 5
WHAT KIND OF FRICKEN CHOCOLATE WAS THAT?
sebastian_afloar 1
Probably a shaving
NickiLalalalaXD 3
good job
zen4681 8
I wish I had talent like that! You be pro!
itsallforfun 0
That's pure talent.