Today, I'm going cold turkey with my drinking and smoking habits. I'm so irritable, I seriously considered running down an old lady who was taking her damn sweet time crossing the road, then shooting the guy in the car behind me for honking at me like I was holding everyone up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML
Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML
Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML
Today, and since I found out that I'm pregnant, I've been sober. I used to smoke weed to help with me depression and anxiety, but now I can't even take prescription medicine for it. I'm about to throw hands at this point. FML
Today, I realised why I’m so irritable these days. My former flatmate smoked so many cigarettes that, now he’s moved out and taken the smoke with him, I’m going through nicotine withdrawal. I realised this after I saw cigarettes in a shop and couldn’t stop staring at them. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML
Today, I realized that if I run out of cigarettes my husband wants nothing to do with me, and when he hits me during a mental breakdown it's all my fault cause I had it coming. He's 40 and acts like this. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML
Today, I was taking a walk, when an elderly lady in a motorized wheelchair slammed into me from behind. There was plenty of room to pass by, but noooo, trying to run me down like a dog, then giving me the finger and yelling "Watch where you're walking!" is so damn preferable. FML
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Top comments
OptimusSlime 23
Maybe it's best to avoid guns, weapons, and such for now...
tin_cup 27
Take a deep breath. Things will get better.
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Comments (72)
tin_cup 27
Take a deep breath. Things will get better.
OptimusSlime 23
Maybe it's best to avoid guns, weapons, and such for now...
ptoka 20
And traffic, avoid traffic... You know what, just stay inside and enjoy a nice root beer and some candy cigarettes until the tension goes down.
capnjacksparrow 7
Maybe just a room. Padded walls. Absolutely no visual stimuli. Or really anything else.
Zarcissa 34
Best of luck to you OP and stay strong, you're doing a good thing.
YumeWolf 23
You've got this OP! It'll get better. Great job for having the guts to quit, you won't regret it in the long run.
emeraldisle 30
Good luck OP! You can do it!
MisterEx 28
Maybe cold turkey your drinking habit first, then your smoking habit, or vice versa? This way you can either shoot people or run them down. Not both.
chosha_fml 27
For a lot of people the two go together and it's harder to resist one when you're doing the other.
tantanpanda 26
I think the latter is perfectly fine to feel in the FML. There are times when I want to snipe somebody's tires because they're doing something extremely stupid or really pissing me off.
trucker2 33
Does that cover the smoking part, or the drinking habit.....
Tatush_ 13
Hang in there OP
AviKerensky 17
Keep your head up. Cold turkey isn't easy, but prove to yourself that you have the willpower. You got this, OP!
Waxwell 21
I've heard s few tips on making things easier. Go to the sauna (sweat out the nicotine and other things, bring water!), eat more fruits and vegetables, take some vitamins, and, most importantly, stay away from them. They say that after three days it gets a lot easier. Hang in there, OP.