Today, I'm going cold turkey with my drinking and smoking habits. I'm so irritable, I seriously considered running down an old lady who was taking her damn sweet time crossing the road, then shooting the guy in the car behind me for honking at me like I was holding everyone up. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML
Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML
Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML
Today, and since I found out that I'm pregnant, I've been sober. I used to smoke weed to help with me depression and anxiety, but now I can't even take prescription medicine for it. I'm about to throw hands at this point. FML
Today, I realised why I’m so irritable these days. My former flatmate smoked so many cigarettes that, now he’s moved out and taken the smoke with him, I’m going through nicotine withdrawal. I realised this after I saw cigarettes in a shop and couldn’t stop staring at them. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML
Today, I realized that if I run out of cigarettes my husband wants nothing to do with me, and when he hits me during a mental breakdown it's all my fault cause I had it coming. He's 40 and acts like this. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML
Today, I was taking a walk, when an elderly lady in a motorized wheelchair slammed into me from behind. There was plenty of room to pass by, but noooo, trying to run me down like a dog, then giving me the finger and yelling "Watch where you're walking!" is so damn preferable. FML
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Top comments
OptimusSlime 23
Maybe it's best to avoid guns, weapons, and such for now...
tin_cup 27
Take a deep breath. Things will get better.
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Comments (72)
EnJey0 19
Don't go cold turkey, your body will suffer from extreme withdrawals. Maybe cut down on how many you have by 1 a day for a week, then 2, the three. Gradually, your body will get used to it
meegal 12
You shouldn't have starting smoking in the first place. YDI. But at least you're realizing you were living your life wrong and are now making the right life decision by stopping. You're improving yourself so I applaud you for that. This is the right thing to do. Also alcohol is poison but it's ok if you only drink occasionally. Like I hate the people who can't have fun with a group of friends or at a party without needing to drink. It's honestly pathetic.
laden_swallow09 35
Just flip the other driver the bird. It'll be all right.
guttedbrit 26
Going cold turkey is tough, but you're brave to do so. You'll be irritable for a while, but not forever. Stay strong and don't give up. But also stay calm, very importantly!
brick0 11
Remember one thing- dig grave six feet deep, put body in it, fill in 3 feet of dirt, put animal body on top of that, fill in remaining dirt. If police dogs do find it they will dig up the animal and put it back then leave.
Tomryan279 10
Want to meet up and grab a beer?
Xion0014 20
Try gum and patches? And get yourself a stress ball
Cenobyte 10
Maybe try one at a time if it's too hard. Stop drinking and when you are comfortable with that, then stop smoking.
rugbyboi 12
I bet you're American aren't you?
Frid_Kun 7
Why is everyone freaked out so much? I always assumed it was a normal attitude to extremely obnoxious people.