Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm recovering from a urinary tract infection. The infection made me have to pee constantly. Now the antibiotics I'm taking for it are giving me the shits instead. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with a kidney infection; the symptoms include nausea and having to pee every five minutes. I had to walk six miles in the pouring rain to pick up the medication, peed in the woods twice, got honked at while throwing up on the road, and my boyfriend told me not to complain. FML
Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML
Today, after breaking my leg, I'm unable to put any weight on it whatsoever. Our bedroom? Upstairs. Our only bathroom? Basement. My husband thought it would be a great idea to leave me alone and unable to walk to go babysit his nieces. I had to piss in a bucket. FML
Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML
Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML
Today, I got home from work, took a shower, got ready for bed, and laid down right in cat piss. Now I'm shampooing the mattress and taking another shower just to sleep on the couch. FML
Today, I went to the doctor to see why my walking pneumonia wasn't getting any better. It had. I've just somehow managed to also contract mono... while sitting home, alone. FML
Today, I'm banned from the only working bathroom in my house because my mother is cleansing for an upcoming colonoscopy. My options are either a bucket in the basement, or wetting myself. FML
Today, I started antibiotics for a UTI. Now, along with a burning sensation whenever I pee, I also need to try not to fall asleep, put up with the headaches, nausea, and lightheadedness from the tablets, all while working two jobs and being a parent. Six days to go. FML
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Top comments
LovesSushi 25
Wait, you're not supposed to pee when you cough?
kut17 11
Wow. You must be in a pissy mood.
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Comments (66)
Connect 10
I feel sorry for you OP, but that is just ******* hilarious!
vettle 6
Urine isn't sterile - that's a common myth. So you're not wrong there. But your story was too long and irrelevant.
Tuffay 14
Kill yourself
PleadingInsanity 20
UTIs are bad enough alone but to have one and walking pneumonia? That really sucks. Hope you feel better soon OP!
cowzorz 3
Oh my God I have been sick for the past two months with the exact same combination... get used to putting down towels everywhere you sit... I feel for you OP!
carmenm 6
Excuse my ignorance but what is walking pneumonia ? And OP definitely FYL unless you could have prevented your UTI or pneumonia
DocBastard 40
Sounds like you actually have pissing pneumonia. Yes, that's the technical term.
DivineSunshine 1
Hope you feel better soon!!!
taystahl 7
I'm sorry!! Hope you become better soon :)
naughtylez82 4
Feel better soon op
neurodoc 1
Cold agglutinins at work! Btw - how did u get infected at both ends? ;) (Just teasing... drink lots of fluids)
perdix 31
Plus, you are making all the guys hot, but you're too sore to do anything about it.