Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML
Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML
Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML
Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML
Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML
Today, my psycho-obsessed ex-girlfriend blabbed all about how she got a check in the mail for $1000 from CrimeStoppers on Facebook and Twitter. This explains how my current girlfriend and two of my friends all got arrested last week for having weed. FML
Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML
Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML
Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
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Top comments
Mega07 6
please go get yourself tested
FMLkoala 28
You mean ex girlfriend right?
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Comments (108)
jsc9306 14
That's crazy.
seacadet 18
whoop, whoop. Badge Bunny!
mimiminx 23
Mind you, you'd think that he would have done a police check on her before he dated her, so if she was well known for being a hooker, it'd have come up.
mazor 22
Ahh... United States, blissful country, where prostitution is illegal..
iluvpeanutbutter 22
Prostitution is illegal in a lot of countries, not just the US.
rosenkrieger223 24
Actually, prostitution is only illegal in most states. Some states do allow it, though it is heavily regulated.
starsfan326 12
That is hilarious. Plus you're a cop and you don't do background checks on your dates and it girlfriends dude? That's what I do lll
Glitter_taco_ 10
That's a but creepy
Chellec2013 28
Actually as an officer it's illegal to check anyone for personal use
junkman6 22
Apparently you're just supposed to trust that someone is telling you the truth? Hell no if I could I would run a background check on every girl I thought about dating. It would have saved me a lot of time, effort, and doctors visits.
Powerfull_fml 8
#70, it's not like your girlfriend being a hooker is an everyday occurrence to justify this sort of paranoia... Then again, I'm not from California (or US)...
ExperimentV 9
Man, that sucks. I'm headed for the academy in a couple of years and... Jeez. I wonder if she thought you'd get her off the hook for that? Some kind of a pissing contest? "My boyfriend will beat your boyfriend" "No he won't my boyfriend a cop?" Hell, I dunno. But seriously. Ouch.
dinagdotphoto 13
Yeah, it makes you wonder whether she was dating a cop on purpose, to help her "business" somehow...
Zombie_Sea_Otter 9
You know how many other dudes you were sleeping with? If it's like a hot dog down a hallway, you know you got problems.
TheRealPitBoss 17
Oh brother that's a ruff egg to swallow! As for you're coworkers some maybe looking that way but surely not everyone, it just feels like they are. Keep you're head up you obviously didn't know that she was a prostitute get checked and be safe out there! Don't let this distract you of you're job.
worldclassrager 41
Do you just get called in on her or patrolling that area? If so I think it would be better to monitor someplace else...
RedPillSucks 33
Kudos for you OP. Many guys would have looked the other way and let her slide. You chose to uphold the law. Ignore the looks from your co-workers, although, I'm wondering how many of them knew she was a prostitute when you started dating.