Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML
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Top comments
Attacksloth 33
Clearly the most important bitch in his life.
Rinat_fml 26
How was the sex though?
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Comments (79)
fmlsams 27
So how does it feel to be somebody's side bitch?
tuxedoandex 28
he a keeper if he care about his dog like that
coldasfire 23
Why do I have more sympathy for the dog than OP?
shinniemc 1
Perhaps he's gay.
Drosophila82 18
What a ******* snag
woodboys23 4
That's not really FML worthy, so what. He loves his dog
bman24uga 3
Mans best friend, can't blame him
mnk5512 7
Marry him. Nothing comes between a man and his dog.
Jordans436 11
Don't worry, his dog will understand
Jose Adame 7
That's horrible! I would have made arrangements to have someone look after my dog. Or you would have been back at my place.