Today, I found out my husband potty trained my stubborn three year-old son who prefers diapers. He managed this by peeing with him and "sword-fighting" with their urine streams. I now have to clean pee off the ground every time he urinates. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, in an attempt to potty train my step-son, my boyfriend and I put underwear on him, hoping that when he peed himself, he would realize using the potty is the way to go. Instead, he peed while sitting on the couch, got up, took off the underwear, and then switched seats. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML
Today, my husband taught our son how to pee while standing. His aim is as poor as my husband's, but I guess now they can blame their mess on each other. FML
Today, I've been potty training my son and almost all of his clothes have been peed on, but for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to do all the laundry together. When I was getting it out of the dryer, everything smelled like pee. FML
Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML
Today, my wife caught our six-year-old son peeing in the bathroom sink. He pulled his little stool up in front, that he uses to brush his teeth, and was peeing in the sink. When we asked why, he said that he wanted to pee like a man, "like we do at football games." My son is using our bathroom sink as an urinal. FML
Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him, "Where did you go to the potty?" He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML
Today, the 3-year-old I nanny wanted to prove to me that he was tall enough to pee standing up in front of the toilet. When he realized he actually was tall enough, he got excited and misdirected his stream, covering himself, his brother, and me in urine. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
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Top comments
ktiskool 18
Make them clean it up and see how much longer it lasts
lexos 16
Does his tactic actually work?
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Comments (100)
zeusdom 15
I'm sure that must have "pissed" you off
DFMLharsh 20
Not as much as this repeated toilet pun does.
Zebediabolical 45
I'd have upvoted this if it weren't in quotes. We're not stupid. We can spot a pun.
shellykjelly 26
Well you know what they say, it's better to he pissed off than pissed on
Schrypt 15
Potty mouth!
xx000o 27
Think about all the money you are saving not buying diapers anymore.
lexos 16
Does his tactic actually work?
Rinat_fml 26
I don't get why she doesn't make him clean it up instead. It's his mess.
muarif 19
Because she knows her work and does it *grabs popcorns* :3
jforren 14
This is the 21st century, get with the times. Sexism isn't cool.
psychopolarbear 28
She wanted her son to use the bathroom. He did. He used the whole bathroom floor around the toilet while sword fighting. I'd say the tactic worked just fine.
CVTTRVN 19
Im with #55. Make ur hubby clean up his mess!
ktiskool 18
Make them clean it up and see how much longer it lasts
domolovesyoshi 33
This is the right advice
devildog562 33
My thought is , why on earth would she clean it up? Unless it is the only bathroom or something. I wouldn't want to clean anyone else's fluid up of I can help it. Besides everyone knows sword fighting belongs outside not in the house.
RickySleeves 20
I'd be so pissed off
Jake42100 17
Your pun is bad,And you should feel bad...You basically took #1's comment by the way...
RickySleeves 20
Sorry about that. Have a great day!
MrConcise 35
#8 - Your reference is bad, and you should feel bad.
SpankyRaven 31
#8 both comments were written at almost the same time. #4 just had the misfortune of hitting submit later than #1. What would be the point in copying?
jessi_sunshine 26
It would seem that urine for a long day, OP.
DFMLharsh 20
^ #1 and #4, this is how a pun is done. Without making it obvious.
LosTe_fml 19
I guess you win some and you lose some...
Otherhats 20
If it works it works? Anyway, straighten out there path. Hehe, see what I did there?
LunaRebirth 7
I see what you did.. used the wrong form of "their".
Otherhats 20
Seriously?.... Bro. If your gonna correct someone's grammar at least be good at it.
xxmollyxx 25
Oh my
Pingvinai 37
You're*
Otherhats 20
You..., >.>
callalilley 18
Don't cross the streams!
appletreee 30
Yuck! I would make them clean it up, OP.
TheBelt 19
You gotta give the man props I mean at least he taught him how to use the toilet now all you gotta do is teach him how to clean his mess after he's done.
Gillett 23
Exactly. Our dad can explain to him that a "Gentleman" always fixes his mistakes and cleans up his messes.