Today, I learned that if you stare down an attractive man while pumping gas, he'll stare back. Then he might ask for your number. At which point his girlfriend will get out of the car and threaten to kick your ass. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
OK Shaggy
Today, I was pumping gas at a gas station. An attractive woman walked by and the guy pumping gas behind me did a whistle/catcall to her. She then looked at me and gave me a disgusted look. I didn't even try to hit on a girl, and still got rejected. FML
False alarm
Today, after I had filled up my car and got into it I saw a cute guy running towards me. I flashed a smile and left the door open and said, "Hey" when he was next to me. He said, "The pump is still attached to your car, you really should be more careful." FML
You dipstick!
Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML
Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML
Today, I saw a very attractive female police officer while at the DMV. Thinking myself suave, I asked her: "Is it sexual harassment if I tell you how beautiful I think you are, and ask for your phone number?" Apparently it was. FML
Keep walking
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Whoomp whoomp
Today, I stopped by the gas station. As I was filling up I noticed a cute guy at the pump next to me. When I was done, I gave him a wink before opening my car door. It was locked. I had to call my Dad to bring my spare keys. The guy was laughing the whole time as I waited for my Dad to show up. FML
We're the main characters
Today, at the gym, a very attractive lady was working out in front of me, wearing tiny shorts that left zero to the imagination. I kept trying to avert my gaze, until her extremely buff boyfriend came over and threatened me. My crime? I wasn’t checking out his girl enough. FML
Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML
Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML
Top comments
zaku2capt 1
Sexy catfight at a gas station? At least snacks are close by.
cmihran 1
Well at least you didn't actually get your ass kicked, could of been worse.
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Comments (129)
ramband2009 0
It's not your fault he's a cheating scumbag. How are you supposed to know she was in the car? Obviously you were only paying attention to the mountain of gorgeous. She just needs to GTFOI
chesseface 4
lmao... all the more reason to carpool
MaximilianMarche 0
did u get the number ?!??
bawlerr75 9
Did he get yuur number at least he docent need that drama of a woman :)
LightUpThaJay 3
Wow. Well, hey, maybe if another female does the same shit you did, perhaps his girlfriend will pull her head out of his ass and realize he isn't worthy of being "boyfriend material".
balljoints 8
Exactly my earlier point. If you have a woman sitting in the passenger seat, you really don't have any business asking another woman for her phone number.
GiantEvilCookie 6
Don't you just hate it when that happens?
crashley21 10
That's not cool. You didn't know he had a gf and the gf shouldn't get upset at you. You didn't know and it's her bf who asked for your number even though he has a gf
sylphy 0
pfff if she came at me, I would have squirted her with the gas, four bucks a gallon or not.
wriptidez 0
well dont stare down people
TrollisMe 5
Maybe you should stop flashing strangers. *****.