Today, after I had filled up my car and got into it I saw a cute guy running towards me. I flashed a smile and left the door open and said, "Hey" when he was next to me. He said, "The pump is still attached to your car, you really should be more careful." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I stopped by the gas station. As I was filling up I noticed a cute guy at the pump next to me. When I was done, I gave him a wink before opening my car door. It was locked. I had to call my Dad to bring my spare keys. The guy was laughing the whole time as I waited for my Dad to show up. FML
Today, after filling fuel in my car, I drove off. The guy behind me left almost at the time. He was behind me, beeping his horn and flashing his lights. I pulled up alongside him at the lights and rolled down the window to ask him what the fuck his problem was. He promptly proceeded to tell me that my fuel cap was still open. FML
Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML
Today, my car ran out of gas. I was 20 feet away from the gas pump and the only person I could ask for help was the attendant, who'd asked me out a week ago. I'd said no, and so did he. FML
Today, I was driving home and stopped at a light. A cute guy in the truck ahead of me waved me forward and told me to roll down my window. It was the first time a cute guy had talked to me in a while so I was pretty excited. He told me to turn my lights on. FML
Today, I left a coffee shop abruptly to go to my car to let out some really bad and loud gas. My window was partly open because it's broken. A stranger was walking on the sidewalk in front of me. He looked terrified. FML
Today, I watched as a guy hit my car, laugh when he saw me running towards him, and drive away. FML
Today, I learned that if you stare down an attractive man while pumping gas, he'll stare back. Then he might ask for your number. At which point his girlfriend will get out of the car and threaten to kick your ass. FML
Today, I parked my car on the street late at night, when I was distracted by a text message. Some guy then gets in my passenger side. Panicked, thinking I was being robbed, I bolt out of my car bruising my head and dropping my phone onto the pavement. The guy meant to get in the car behind me. FML
Today, I was driving in a busy area looking for a place to park. I happened to lock eyes with a really handsome man who was walking alongside the road. He approached my car with a huge, gorgeous smile, and as I rolled my window down, he asked, "Are you my Uber?" FML
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Top comments
Bauer_fml 0
Smoooooooooth. (Dear FML members, I know there's a pun somewhere in this FML. Find it.)
Chiroptera_Man 10
He must have not been too hot, or else this could have been a very flammable situation! :D 'Cause of the gas... and... hot.. fire... stuff. c:
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Comments (36)
Bauer_fml 0
Smoooooooooth. (Dear FML members, I know there's a pun somewhere in this FML. Find it.)
Killuhk 8
Trix are for kids?
capslockisgood 19
42 - Not a pun but good enough!
Chiroptera_Man 10
He must have not been too hot, or else this could have been a very flammable situation! :D 'Cause of the gas... and... hot.. fire... stuff. c:
justawallflower 27
The same thing I thought.
KenMcGormick 0
sounds like Massa
JessxMaxine 0
That's what you get for thinking you are all hot.
grace31297 14
Well, somebodies bitter!
dogpup4 23
For smiling?
historymaker 0
I do this all the time- except i drive away with the pump in my car and dont realize until an hour or so later ha
Zonedout 2
sounds like something I would do, kinda like forgetting to close your trunk after packing cause of good song comes on the radio.
holynemesis1208 3
haha. that's great. i have always wanted to be at a gas station when somebody drives off still attached to the pump.
alishaleesha 1
Haha, #14 made me laugh. I love smartasses.
Chickmechanic69 0
Ok...... first of all I'm a girl... #11 and #12 and the author are the type of women who give us bad names. If you are that air headed you should not be allowed to OWN a vehicle let a lone drive one. Forgetting to close your trunk isn't THAT horrible..... but seriously..... Change your hair colour or something and try thinking.... It's not that difficult to NOT FOR GET YOU"RE FILLING YOU DAMN CAR. This is why I hate working with women and am glad I work in an automotive shop.
twilightluvr101 4
Forget is one word....
hotdawg 0
#17 yours is even better than this post. lol. sorry to hear that tho
Jimmy_fml 0
yea, here where i live in atlanta the pump doesn't latch on the car so by driving away you don't take the gas station and it's attendant home with you