Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML
Today, an extremely attractive woman from FedEx came to deliver my new phone. I was wearing athletic shorts and had an erection. She looked down and laughed. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML
Today, I realized that I get more turned on by my exercise bike than my boyfriend of 4 years. FML
Today, while riding to the skate park, I noticed a gorgeous blonde walking towards me. She gave me a smile as I passed so I turned and looked behind me to get a second glance. I rode my BMX straight into a light pole in front of a pub patio full of people. She saw it all. FML
Today, I approached the girl I like, hoping to ask her out. Just as I strode up to her, she excused herself as quickly as she could. I then realized I'd forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the bathroom minutes before. FML
Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML
Today, the girl I've secretly loved for years finally noticed me. That is, after I ran over her foot with my truck. FML
Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML
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Top comments
mama2b3 20
YDI for wearing spandex biking shorts.
Raiden353 0
did she like it?
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Comments (188)
redettechick 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
embarresed!
im2good25 0
how did u get an erection so fast? was she naked?
UrNotFunny 0
win
redshortsx 0
you got a boner just by looking at her? was she doin something kinky? or are you just ******* weird?
ImaBmyLonurTees 0
there goes the "secret"
sparkz2010 0
not such a fukin secret now wonder if she reads fml lol if she does
tweetbaby14 18
and that's why no one likes those damned shorts
pepper3434 0
Er... If I was her, uh, I'd be freaked out, and move far FAR away from you...
wooow_sucks_for_ 0
hey! we can't help it! she should be flattered!
drav 0
I bet mines bigger
Horney4her69 0
I got an erection just reading this fml.
gIsaac 0
ydi for wearing spandex lol
MidgetMonster 0
that'll teach you to wear spandex shorts again, ya weirdo
killerviral 0
u have no ******* control my girlfriend can do the most sexiest stuff and I can tame the beast
reyemrein 0
64 is right under no circumstances should a man wear spandex
blitzen123 0
Perv.
blondierat 0
it's just an erection - are u 12?
kally2010 0
if your gonna wear spandex why not wear another pair over them ?? it's like girls and sports bras except we wear t shirts over them !
kcyrusm 0
You sir are an idiot. Wearing something over it defeats the purpose of wearing the spandex in the first place. It's for aero dynamics. Aren't spandex really tight? How was this guy able to even pitch a tent?
zZPedobearZz 0
when i was younger, a camp leader at a camp i went to got an erection when we had "spandatory mandex (mandatory spandex)" night. it was lol but nasty
jazziue 0
shame on you for wearing spandex
deathcab7 0
op gets turned on too easily. i feel bad for the girl,. awkwarrdd.
crazycornn 0
well I'm sorry but you never had a chance if you apprached her wearing spandex shorts so it's just as well.
jt0070 0
VIRGIN!!!! that's the only way ud get hard so quickly
garrettgoshorn 0
and now she saw how big his dick was I bet she laughed lol
garrettgoshorn 0
hahahaha nice one
Meggxo 0
forreal doesn't take much 4 him! ahhha
samantha_durano 6
why were you wearing spandex bikini shorts?
kjhowse 0
how did yu get hard... way to control it buddy
drilher244 0
what kinda queer wears spandex biker shorts? really!!!
Kureeziineko 3
80 is a sexist.
upintheorange 5
it's not sexist if you just don't want to see the guys balls through his pants all the time.
S0_Fricken_CUtE 0
u guys are retarded. when ur a boy from 11 to teens u can get hard from just looking at a girl u like. u can't control it
im_so_ninja 0
agreed
sk8rchick97 0
L-O-S-E-R whos the loser?? U ARE!!(:
hailey8D 0
akwarrdddd...
FYLDeep 26
....I got an erection in my shorts and then as she said "Hello", I jizzed in my pants.
crazycornn 0
this really never happens you can take my word, I won't apologize that's just absurd, mainly your fault for the way that you dance and now I...
Str84rumBK 0
next day my alarm goes off an I jizzed Iny pants.
Raiden353 0
did she like it?
strandedinalimo 0
That's what I would like to know!
mama2b3 20
YDI for wearing spandex biking shorts.
GodBarack 5
Agreed ^
BigandDurable 0
exactly
ringmybell_fml 0
#36... damn :)
Justin714 1
yep
Ep1cPha1l 0
whats damn about 36?
QWERTYCommander 5
Agreed, #4, agreed. Real men ride naked!
suppressed08 2
on bikes AND in the bedroom!
c0nfuzzled 0
haha win^
sakinxdevil 0
agreeeed... and plus I believe you had a crush. Not " in love"
donttreadonme1 0
at 86 so u ride fully clothed
lakaiskate 12
he's infatuated
Bizenghastly 0
86- LOLS ! ^_^ & in my opinion, spandex only works if you're Superman
jdomfml 0
**** her in the street bro!!
glen12 0
^^^^ this^^^^
mama2b3 20
YDI for wearing spandex biking shorts.
jake_fml 0
you win for being word for word with #4
Rickymonkeypants 0
he is the same person as #4
TheBreaKer_fml 0
its the same guy bro
Nakedsquirrel 5
You should have played it off and said the boner was from the bike seat jammed up your crack. She wouldn't think you're a wierdo then!
Asstazztic 8
I bet she got hard too except you couldn't see it ;) lol
LTMcleod 0
we call that being wet. :)
purplemnm 9
thanks captain obvious, for pointing out the obvious even though when I already got the joke you had to point out the obvious and ruin the joke which was funny because of the obvious and you had to go point out the obvious point again becoz you're captain obvious. oh btw you're an obvious stater...now I'm captain obvious!!!
quikwit1212 0
And the word obvious was just said about 15 times...
garrettgoshorn 0
nice attempt at trying to be funny. FAIL
purplemnm 9
I wasn't trying to be funny, that my dear was a rant against people who state the obvious
titenite88 0
I love how purple's description on her profile says that she is a grammar Nazi yet she still refused to use correct punctuation. Hmmm...contradiction?
titenite88 0
Oh, and she said "becoz." I'm sorry but I can't handle this much fail in one place...
friedchickenpie 14
Go home, purplemnm, you're drunk
relyo 0
Not a secret anymore.
BrownSugar_fml 5
So did she say "what's up?"
daniel1_1 13
haha i get it lol